Mark Hamill is a national treasure and the embodiment of American virtue.

They made poor Mardon seem all the more painfully generic.

I told you, Dad. Nick Cannon is hilarious.

But barring an extended cameo from Dave Chappelle, whose voice blends seamlessly into the stylized speech of the script, and a climax which, in a movie rife with bad puns, inevitably involves a televised seduction-off between Lysistrata and her gang leader boyfriend, Demetrius (Nick Cannon, surprisingly not bad),…

Probst sounded SO goofy when he asked "D'ya wanna know what it is?" during the reward challenge this week. It threw me for a loop. He was almost giddy.

True. But even then, I think there are other targets than Abi. Even targeting Keith might have made more sense if we're targeting potential goats. He's a likable guy, but at least Abi has an argument if she gets in front of the jury, namely that while she's volleyed from one alliance to another, it's all been about…

And on a season basically designed for him to win. They cast a bunch of goobers and then put in a twist that would help put him back in the game if he got voted out. Rob played an immaculate game, no doubt. But I just can't rate it as highly as someone like Kim Spradlin, Yul Kwon, Brian Heidik or Danni Boatwright, who…

Actually, I thought Joe's argument was the big weakness in his approach. If he's right in his assumption that everyone would want to go to the end with Abi, then why did he think anyone would actually be on board with voting her out? She literally has zero chance of winning this game. She was drawing dead by Day 6, if…

With Tasha poised to change the game, it makes me wonder how good of an idea it really was to get rid of Stephen last week. At least for Spencer's game, particularly since he wasn't being targeted by Fishbach anyway. Then again, if it hadn't been Stephen, it would have been Joe, and we'd be right back in the same spot…

I think the real tragedy of Joe's arc is that, realistically, he can never win Survivor, no matter how many times he plays. He's too likable and he's too big of a challenge threat. It doesn't matter if it's a cast of second-time players or complete newbies, no cast in their right mind would ever let Joe get to the…

Savage showing up at tribal like

"It's 'M' as in 'Mancy'!"

Downton Abbey is jealous of this finale's ability to go an hour without anything happening.

She went to the Fear The Walking Dead school of parenting, in which kids are kept in the dark by the parents, who hope the problem will just magically go away before they have to tell their kids what's going on.

Seriously though, what kind of a name is Negan anyway?

At some point, I feel like I'm going to have to cut bait on Morgan. His "all life is precious, even though it's actively hurting us right now" approach is kind of grating, even while I get it from a character perspective (and even kind of respect it). It feels less like this was done to give us insight into who Morgan…

I can't wait not to give that show a second season.

They tried to make us care by turning it into a Bob-like death where they stretch it out over the course of the hour. But then she couldn't even give us the closure of letting us see her death. It had to be one last stand. Blech.

Pete's bloodline is fucking useless.

I'm more annoyed that it appears to be yet another challenge that involves balancing things. It's seriously getting out of hand.