You are a bigger man than I, as I think we should forcefeed him all the media, Clockwork Orange style, until we reach the predicted conclusion.

It’s government who does not want him to succeed

Wait, what idiot/asshole restaurant manager sent a bicycle delivery across the Hudson?

I’ve been really impressed with all the reporters who have been stepping up and helping out. Other than that douche that called the cops for looting in the middle of a disaster.

It’s not anti-bicycle. It’s saving someone quality time with a squeegee to clean up after.

It not like Jersey City is on the goddam moon. Anyone who lives in Jersey City should be able to figure out that the Lincoln Tunnel isn’t the best bike path, much like the nearer Holland Tunnel, the Turnpike, etc.

I suppose the app that gave him directions was the same app that told the person living in midtown that the fastest way to order pizza for delivery was to get it from Dominos in Weehawken. Not sure who’s the bigger idiot here.

Yeah, I know. It was more . . . metaphorical?

Apparently there are high school teams (in wealthy NE suburbs) which are shutting down due to a lack of interest because parents aren’t letting their kids play football anymore.

I think you read that wrong, cause it’s perfect for “non-white Becky”.

I think whoever is in charge should address it, in private, and explain to the intern that it’s best practice to dress business casual—and runner shorts don’t fit that description.

My boss once spoke to a young team member of ours about her attire. She had worn a strappy blouse with bra straps peeking out to a formal meeting. Boss very clearly made the message about visible underwear being inappropriate in an office setting (whether a bra or boxers). “Dressing too nicely” is really vague, and I…

This is who they made Forever 21 for. This is who they make Pantene Hair conditioner for.

Jezebel readers.

Michael - I haven’t read this yet but thank god because I really needed a hot take because today sucks and I just need something to laugh at and you never let me down.

sadly for the rest of us, his actions are irreversible and he remains a deeply shitty person

Jaxxxon Braxton Williams-Davis, et al v. Major League Lacrosse

Then what would keep his hair from skittering away?

Dreadful take. I’ve seen Kate Mara in person and she is stop-traffic beautiful.

More attractive than 98% of the women either of us have met in our lifetimes. But yeah, maybe not supermodels.