As a local taxpayer, he’s not just an irate stepfather. He’s also an owner.

Canadians! They’re just as horrible as everybody else.

Wow. A player effectively banned from playing his sport in an entire country?! He must have REALLY disrespected their national anthem. 

You’d think disposal would be more complicated when dealing with anything involving the CFL.

Sometimes, it all works out innuendo.

Is Philly going to erect somethng in his honor?

i feel like this must be some kind of record for dick jokes per unit word

I mean, say what you will about Elizabeth Holmes, but my god is she an amazing pioneer in the field of gender equality for massive corporate con-jobs. 

Yeah. Shame about the country though.

The brand that gave us Trump Steaks, Trump Vodka, Trump University and Don Jr.

As a wise man once said “Sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I won’t eat the filthy mutherfucker.”

I dunno, I can’t reach it, I might enjoy it. Who can say?

Same woman was charged with trafficking in Massachusetts:

Beats me.  I’ve asked nearly every time, even suggested the crappiest thing on their used lot or hinted that a decent oaner might coerce me into buying a new car.  No joy in any case.

So Robert Kraft went to a seedy massage parlor in a Florida strip mall at 11 a.m. that Sunday, then presumably got on his private plane and flew to Kansas City, where he watched the NFL team he owns punch a ticket to the Super Bowl. Rich people are so fucking bizarre.

He was wearing a New York Giants cap and signed in under the name “John Mara.”

FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND PURE, DON’T READ THE DOCUMENT EXCERPTS!

“at least one other unidentifiable bill”

Funny story about dealership loaners: Summer, 2008 I worked as a lot porter/detailer/utility guy at our local BMW, Land Rover, Jaguar, Mini dealership and as one would imagine, the service department was extremely busy. They had a vast loaner fleet, which was comprised of mostly LR3's and various BMW sedans, all of…

This hasn’t gone exactly to plan...