I hear him yelling too, but I also heard those awful lyrics in my head and this was the only appropriate response

Scarlett Johansson filmed Avengers 2 (including some of her own stunts) while pregnant and is therefore my pregnancy hero/icon because goddamn.

Nickelback is not too powerful to overcome. Try harder.

You are SO MUCH better than this toad. He doesn’t even deserve your headspace.

I have adulted so hard today. I went grocery shopping and bought healthy things to eat, including a whole chicken. I have roasted the whole chicken, cut it down into pieces, picked every piece of meat off, made a gravy from the drippings and am now making stock from the bones.

If you have a sourdough starter, I’ve had good luck with the recipes on the King Author Flour website. Every recipe I’ve tried has been really good, but here are three that I make frequently. If you make the biscuits, I recommend decreasing the butter slightly and adding some cheese.

He sucks and we hate him and he is wrong.

http://www.jamesbeard.org/recipes/banana…

BTDT; the rewards of getting out are amazing. The kids are happy. I’m happy. It will be worth every bit of effort.

Can he take a leave for a while? If that’s an option, I think it might help to be able to go in with a concrete suggestion.

CALLING ALL CRAFT JEZZIES-

I’m throwing my best girls a Galentines Day party! I’m so excited to have a reason to buy cute decorations, the menu is breakfast foods and mimosas. I can’t wait! (If you don’t know, it’s based on an episode of Parks and Recreation where Leslie urges everyone to celebrate lady friends!)

Also, what does WebMD say about your vagina turning into a flower?

Your vagina turning into a flower is definitely cancer. But then again, your vagina not turning into a flower is also probably cancer.

You’re covered in nuts. You’re having a bad dream. You’re covered in nuts.

My life goal is to be an adult like Melissa McCarthy in The Heat.

read the card

Better a flower than a loaf of bread.

Wait maybe your vag turns into a flower if you put one of those tea-bag douche thingies in it.