I do that too. My dentist keeps telling me I’ll get cancer. More than once I’ve ripped open a deep enough gash that my mouth has filled with blood while I’ve been in a social situation/at work. It’s gross, but I guess I’m just thankful that my OCD didn’t manifest itself as nose-picking or something more…

That’s a beautiful dream, and one I try to bring about every day.

I firmly believe that it does matter. Due to our batshit gun laws, you have to kind of ignore the fact that they’re heavily armed. These short-dicks go everywhere heavily armed. Right now they’re illegally trespassing on federal property and making a lot of noise about ‘revolution’ but again, if you ignore the guns,…

Anytime these mouthbreathers go off on twitter with their ‘Molon Labe’ bullshit I tell them I snuck into their house and took their guns while they weren’t looking. I’ve kept dumb fuckwits going for hours as they insist I can’t have took their guns. Right as they reach peak apoplexy I’ll slip in something like how I…

See my response above to the same point. they have yet to set out any demands or anything resembling a coherent political ideology (one might say the same of Donald Trump), and they haven’t, you know, terrorized anyone. They’re just really angry, really scared white people who lack the self-awareness to realize that…

They’d have to have a political agenda, and they’d have to be violent. Their political agenda seems to be a dislike of the federal government, but that’s hardly a unique viewpoint. As for violence, they broke into an empty building. Given how big and isolated SE Oregon is, and the ubiquity of federal buildings out…

We shouldn’t even dignify these shits with a name. Just cut the power and water, bring in whatever crazy tech the FBI has to shut down wireless communication, and wait until they turn cannibal and arrest whoever is left.

Let’s be real about terrorism for a moment. The purpose of terrorism is to use violence to enact a political agenda that isn’t achievable by normal political means, usually by scaring people enough to get them to act like idiots. Are you scared? I’m not and I live in Oregon. I’ve actually BEEN to the Malheur…

Yeah but the phaeton was still a Volkswagen.

Don’t forget that gorgeous paper.

I live in Portland and know people in both the coffee and chocolate communities. This isn’t crappy frozen food in a different bag. This is Volkswagen trying to sell a Jetta as a Bentley by rebadging a Jetta and then just lying like hell when the stickers come off and it’s clearly just a Jetta. I’ve eaten a fair amount…

My wife bought me 24 winter warmers for an advent gift (made possible by the always amazing Belmont Station) and I just drank a velvet merkin last night. Delicious. Reminded me of Ninkasi’s Oatmeal Stout. If you like really creamy/smooth stouts with a punch you should try Hitachino Nest’s Espresso Stout. It’s my…

Jubelale is amazing, and every time I read Will’s articles I have to remember that he lives on the East coast, a primitive place full of bad to mediocre beer as evidenced by the fact that Sam Adams always places on these lists. There’s just no way he’d know about Gigantic’s Superbad or Ecliptic’s Frosty Leo (both…

You can plug in the things they unplug. I had the exact same thing happen when I moved into my new house, I just got out my ladder, connected things to things until the internet worked, and never mentioned it to Comcast.

I was an interim manager of a team that had employees who flexed between teams a lot (it was the recession and our company was getting creative with our inability to afford employees). One of my employees had recently transferred out to a location in the suburbs doing a totally different job. The manager of that team…

No mention of Antonio French holding up all stadium proposals until Mayor Slay does something, anything, about the intentional neglect and predatory policing affecting the poor of St. Louis county? The man is single handedly fucking all of this up and god bless him for it. French’s quest to get the wheels of…

Hang on, that ‘light through a magnifying glass’ question is bullshit. What does that even mean? Front to back? Upside down? That’s a poorly designed question. I’ll cede our generally poor science knowledge, but get your questions on point.

Just because Reddit thinks it doesn’t mean it’s not untrue. Most of my friends who lived there in the 90’s and early 2000’s have been priced out. The shitty diner where we planned WTO protests was bulldozed for condos, etc. It’s just change, but it don’t mean I have to like it bygummit. Now excuse me, I have to go…

Reddit, like Sea-Chicken fandom, is best left to chubby Rand fan-boys, angry illiterates, the criminally insane, and methodists.

I come from a Pacific Northwest family of sports fans, split evenly between the Seattle and Portland areas. We are mostly Mariners fans, split between Sonics/Blazers, and not a single goddamn Sea-Chickens fan. Anyone who claims to have been a Seahawks fan before, say, 2010 is flat out fucking lying to your face. My…