Hey, have you heard the new track from my Indie Hip-Hop crew Cosmic Mummies?

God forbid your government, the only entity with any chance of pushing back against huge multinational corporations whose stated goal is profit, take an interest in your health. Because huge corporations have such a great track record protecting the little guy.

Sperm? But how could they know without a microscope?

If I’m reading these articles correctly, especially the Smithsonian’s, the papyrus is in no way describing the building the Great Pyramid. It’s the daily journal of what we would consider today to be a trucker for a freight company. He picked up & transported all types of “cargo” from all over Egypt.

Do you want Cosmic Mummies? Because this is how you get Cosmic Mummies.

Khufu: - Architect, I want the pyramid finished NOW!

And have you ever tried to get Domino’s to deliver to “that sealed door that even the best science 4000 years in the future will be unable to detect”?

Boom.

RIGHT?!

Thanks - except the papyrus doesn’t say how the pyramids were constructed - it discusses the logistics of the operation of assembling materials on the site. It complements the work done on the quarries near Giza and Tura which have revealed the labour camps and some details about the workers.

Just cut it in half and keep it on display. It’ll draw just as many tourists!

It was pretty great until the vending machines ran out and we realized the vending machine guy wasn’t sealed in with us.

They would have detected it a lot sooner if they hadn’t been stunned.

Do you want curses? Because this is how you get curses.

Who were then sealed inside to serve their Pharaoh in the afterlife. Naturally!

Came here for this - left satisfied.

shhh, you might wake him up,

‘The only known documents, written on papyri, only describe the logistics of the construction, such as how the stones were transported (fun fact: the Great Pyramid contains an estimated 2.3 million blocks).’

“... archeologist Luis Alvarez... lacked the technological and scientific know-how to pull it off...” [emphasis added]

Lunch room for the workers.