Pictured: a new Mercedes and its depreciation curve

Here’s your side by side proof that old is better.

No, it’s ugly.  

I also vibrate like crazy with mechanical stimulus

I thought for sure it was a troll... and they were going to bring out the “real one”.... I’m literally shocked at how bad this is.

Hey here’s a wild idea - just use regular door handles that everyone knows how to use!

Chonk-E

I HATE when I murder someone then cut up their body with a bone saw. I’m all like, shit I didn’t mean to do that. 

Hey Torch, man, thanks for a bunch of good times here. I’m sorry the site is exploding due to weaponized incompetence, but if it’s any consolation the work you and your colleagues do is great, and I am confident it will soon be recognized by someone who knows how to, say, own and operate a media website.

Petchesky was just canned, unbelievable.

How great would it be if the other blogs all started covering sports today?

Deadspin usually has sports?

As someone who was once part of a similar insurrection against arrogant, incompetent, and condescending management, I want to applaud all of y’all for today’s showing. I’m sure you’re simultaneously enjoying the fun of mutiny while also understanding the risk. Please also know how much it means to us here in the feebl…

Honestly, this blog post has far too much sports-adjacent content, IMO. Needs less sports.

David, I wish to register a complaint. You’ve filed this story to Politics, but this is erroneous, as this is clearly a Sports Story.

You guys are awesome. It is not hyperbole to say that this site often gets me through the day. Keep up the good work, and for the love of god do not stick to sports.

I don’t even have to see the autoplay videos because I’ve fixed my browser. But I just locked my work computer and a notification is on the screensaver about the thing playing, with an option to pause.

Deadspin’s bosses, turn this ridiculous shit off, it’s not making you money and it’s pissing off all your readers…

PLEASE INFORM SOMEONE TO TURN OFF THE DAMN AUTOPLAYING VIDEOS

Stop the auto-play videos with sound already, I’m going to complain in every comment.