Same number of games as Roethlisberger got for his second sexual assault allegation. Neat.

So it’s worse than beating your wife, but not as bad as beating your wife but being caught on tape.

nb4 “We hit into triple plays the right way.”

Yes, calling someone an asshole on twitter should be reciprocated with violence.

I saw that. That doesn’t justify keying someone’s car.

I want to say Porsche 917, but I’ll instead say Porsche 956 because of the awesome iconic ad.

Is it too late to say Audi R8? the most dominate endurance racer ever.

Porsche 917.

Really? “On during a work day” is a reason why you don’t get to see the Champions League? Your work day consists of writing stories about pants shitting.

It seems almost too obvious to point out that this is a bad, bad list.

NHL playoffs are incredibly enticing. Anyone who thinks differently is a heathen and deserves to be cast from society.

Revenge fantasies for monstrous people are natural, but shouldn't be within the scope of the law.

That’s the Jalop consensus on most innovations.

This is a soccer blog.

Classic. Blame the victim.

Then what compelled you to click the link, find a video, and comment

Actually, if you read the whole piece, only 8 of the team's 46 members were even at the party (the others were away playing a game), the party wasn't an official team event, and the way they've been characterized by the administration isn't exactly reflective of the reality, which is much more complicated than "SPORTS…

Rick, let me be clear, those glasses don't make you look any smarter

Volvo hates making imaginary money that Jalops will throw at their own monitors because none of them a) buy new cars and/or b) can afford new cars.

"Past the gate, big white circus-style tents tethered to generators and heaters formed a temporary village of out-of-state electrical workers, here to aid in the recovery. Some came south from Connecticut, others came north from Tennessee, but none were Islanders, in any sense of the word. Every time we see one of…