The governor went on to reiterate that schools would remain closed through the end of the year and praised the “extraordinary heroism” of moms, parents, caregivers, and teachers during this time of social isolation.

In fact, it’s an ancient African proverb passed down from mothers whose children want to know why they can’t play outside: “Because I fucking said so!”

The revised date is exceptionally intriguing for a number of reasons. In addition to revealing H. heidelbergensis/rhodesiensis as a long-lived species, the new dating coincides with the emergence of early modern humans, who debuted during the Middle Stone Age some 300,000 years ago.

A mildly entertaining entry for April Fool’s Day.  You’ve had better, more compelling offerings in previous years, but I applaud your dedication to the bit.  Danke.

If you’re gonna time loop, then time loop right.

Did it explain the time loop?

This planet has more than enough resources to support everyone alive and their children if we distribute them equitably and stop destroying the planet to satisfy the limitless greed of a small minority of people who hoard a disproportionate amount of resources.

I’d further point out regarding 

Granted, I’m no cleric nor am I a Christian but I’ve read a little thing called the Bible and can confirm with a hundred percent certainty that Jesus would have wanted Christians to stay home. If you’d all turn your Bibles to Romans 13:2, “Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what…

Amendment 1: Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof...

Y’know, I am not normally inclined to take life advice from grown men who make their living playing pretend and saying whatever other people pay them to say.

https://www.bls.gov/cps/cpsaat23.htm

Yes, the President* - who wasn’t in the building for any of the impeachment proceedings - couldn’t respond to a building health crisis because he had to be ...not in the building during impeachment proceedings. What the absolute shit.

You’ve never been to a gun show, I take it.

So is that 100,000 to 240,000 goal range for worldwide deaths or national? The slide does not indicate that these numbers are national estimates.

They’re bringing up the “why now” thing because the answer is obvious and they want to point it out. Ford only made her claims against Kavanaugh when he was nominated for the Supreme Court. Ford wanted to keep Kavanaugh off the Court in order to protect Roe. So she lied having been sexually assaulted to tank his…

They’re bringing up the “why now” thing because the answer is obvious and they want to point it out. Ford only made her claims against Kavanaugh when he was nominated for the Supreme Court. Ford wanted to keep Kavanaugh off the Court in order to protect Roe. So she lied having been sexually assaulted to tank his…

Trump isn’t being pissy because the governor of Michigan is female. He’s being pissy because the governor of Michigan is a Democrat. So cut the idiotic “sexism” crap. Trump pulls this shit with anyone who opposes him. Their gender isn’t a factor. By making that the focus of your article, all you’re doing is…

Replace Republicans with Democrats and abortion clinics with gun stores, then see if you really object to elected officials using this crisis to systematically deny the people the ability to exercise their Constitutional rights. Because Democrats are pulling the same shit, just against a different right. But since…

...because Dolt 45 sent all our PPE to China LONG AFTER he was briefed about COVID-19.