Thank you.

in the words of the 2001 head doctor of Stony Brook’s CPEP ward: “Who’re they gonna believe, some stupid little shit with a fucked up head or the kindly old doctor? I’ve been doing this for YEARS.” nobody ever believes the child. ever.

One of my great disappointments with the focus on bullying is that every parent is quick to protect their child but very few parents even consider that their child would ever be a bully. It is the same with abuse-- we focus our child-rearing on protecting our child but forget that we also need to teach them boundaries…

As I said, this was right after the Bobby Greenlease kidnapping/murder in Kansas City and was a huge, huge deal in the Midwest in 1953. Bobby had been described everywhere as a “very trusting, obliging little boy” and, when a woman appeared at his school, identified herself as “an aunt from out of town,” told the…

When the preschool was saying that my 3yr old is biting kids and misbehaving, while coming home with injuries,we initially took their word for it. But she didn’t behave that way around any other kids. The more we discussed it with our very verbal 3 year old we were pretty sure that the preschool was looking the other…

They ignore it. They accuse the child of making it up to get attention. They categorically deny that the accused could or would ever do such a thing because ‘that just doesn’t happen in families like ours.’

I know that foundation helped me to cope and to eventually forgive for my own well-being

Also, in a case like the letter where the kid mentions the abuse while laughing because they don’t get the sexual aspect of butt licking and just think it’s funny (because the act of “licking a butt,” in a vacuum, IS gross and funny), it’s just that much easier to brush it off as a funny misunderstanding and silently…

Absolutely. I was very young when I finally told my mother about the serious sexual assault I experienced by someone close to the family. She was decisive and relentless—through reporting to the police, all the interviews and the court hearings and therapy, through my crippling fear and other people’s judgement. I…

I made one outcry, in a therapists office, with my mother present, when I was 8 or 9. It wasn’t even about the worst of it. My mother lost her fucking mind and was weeping and wailing and made it so much about herself that my issue pretty much got ignored and never spoken of again. She deliberately derailed that…

My mother...gah, my mother. When I was 7, a family acquaintance tried to kidnap me. (We lived in a very, very small town and everybody was a family acquaintance.) This was right after the Bobby Greenlease kidnapping/murder in KC so we kids were on high alert. I had sense enough to hightail it to my grandparents’ home.

I think that the believe that only “evil” people commit acts like this keeps victims from being believed actually.

You would be amazed at the number of mothers blowing off their daughters with regards to the mother’s boyfriend.

You sound like one of the good ones.  Thank you for what you do, and stay safe out there.  

Many go into instant denial regardless of the facts, and some of them even turn on the kid and punish them for “making up stories.” The latter is unfortunately not uncommon when the abuser is a trusted church leader.

They don’t take action? They ignore it?

Some ignore it. They’ve think, “So and so would never do something like that” or chalk it up to an overactive imagination.  Some of these parents were victimized themselves.  It’s brutal. 

I’ve worked in law enforcement for 20 years. Sadly, many parents aren’t like you.  For what it is worth, great job. You took action immediately. This isn’t your fault, or hers.  I’m so sorry. 

Terry Crews is such a fucking treasure. I would say that it's appalling that men as old as 50 Cent and Russell Simmons are still acting like 12 year old boys in P.E. but it's not appalling at all. What sad pieces of shit they must be. 

This guy is VERY abusive, wow!