One of these days...

Ooh! Oooh! Can I come, too?!

I totally just followed you off this because I have a Kinja Crush on you. I am too lazy to stalk people, so this is as far as my crush will ever go.

I can’t wait to see that kid’s first day of school pic. Wonder what she'll write on the chalkboard

Cracked is wrong. Evidence: Patrick Stewart

SUIT SHAMING!

Make it you on all denominations, like that other Dawes song.

I’m glad his wife is at least fixing his hair these days. OPTICS, BERNIE, OPTICS.

Septuagenarian Jewish Socialists are not known for their fashion sense. Believe me.

whatever I’m a sucker for big lips I’d still try and hit that.

I was genuinely shocked Jeb could not think of a single American woman to put on the $10 bill. And it isn’t even like he went first!! He could have said “Rosa Parks” as well and it still would have been a better answer than Margaret Thatcher. (No hate to the Iron Lady but come on)

Also, MOTHER TERESA?

WHY DIDN’T THEY SAY SUSAN B. ANTHONY

so disappointed he didn’t make a left turn and commit to the Addams Family tho

I hear you, but also, that IS kinda his whole thing. Like you know he does that ish somewhat purposefully.

see, i kind of like the frump. he’s got comfortable tennis shoes on. he’s got other things on his mind.

I drank alone and watched Person of Interest. I know I came out ahead.

Once you hit 70, nothing fits right. Or so a Cracked article about why old people smell funny and dress weird told me.

I made pad thai! We should trade these goods to strengthen the free market economy.