- Don’t just hand someone your phone.

Gauthier is adorable.

She spent 51k on this coat recently:

My mom does this all the time. I’ll give my phone to her and she swipes through. Jokes on her though, all I take pictures of is my kids, food, and landscapes.

For my last new car I went through Costco, I’ll never do it any other way now.

Is this where I can share hundreds of painful stories of tire-kicking, blood-sucking, bottom-feeder, mooching customers that wasted more time of my life than I want to admit to? Those dealership horror stories go both ways.

Oh. my. god. That expression on her face is beyond nauseating. Adoring and somehow pleading at the same time. Sums it all up, doesn’t it?

There is nothing about this family that isn’t skin-crawlingly creepy. The weird vacant expressions, the 1980s hair done to please some pervy old man, the stepford smiles, the fact that they “blanket train” (aka hit) BABIES. It’s all so weird.

Yeah, no. They’re suing to protect all the Joshes of the world.

These motherfuckers are all a bunch of traitorous bastards who deserve to be locked up. In a world in which “justice” was anything more than a marketing slogan, they would be. 

All I know for sure is that this impeachment hearing is going to be SO MUCH BETTER than “What is the definition of ‘is’?” Although, to give Bill credit, that was awesome. Not on a human level, but on a base, gross, I’m so upset that I actually liked this level. This will be better, though.

You’re reporting is keeping me sane. Because I know I’m not the only one who feels like it has been years but in reality it’s only 117 fucking days.

It’s OK, you guys. The WaPo comment section assures me that this is FAKE NEWS.

That’s not how any of this works....

It is being disputed since it hit the news cycle, but the FDA has been ordered to switch its televisions from CNN to Fox.

The thing about the Rabbi Shmuley selfie is what is written ON the whiteboard: Muslim Ban (checked as completed) - this accidental evidence will kill the White House’s contention (in the appellate courts) that the travel restrictions were anything other than religious discrimination (and leave no room to argue that…

“An Israel-Palestinian agreement will be “frankly, not as difficult as people have thought,” our president has predicted. Jared has this shit covered!”

I can’t get over how everyone speaking about this FYRE fiasco keep talking about people being “safe”. You can almost hear the hushed tones around the word. Give me a break. A day or two stuck on an island in the Bahamas with apparently no water or plumbing system admittedly sounds awful, but I really don’t think…

Shouldn’t his first priority be to apologize to Kendall Jenner?

I suspect the children of 12,000 very rich, white, upper-middle class lawyers and bankers are not the best group of people to fuck sideways if you want a life free of legal drama.