Thumbing My Way (To Climax)
Spin the White Jizzom
Oceans (Of Semen)
1/2 Full (Of Cum)
Just Breathe (Through Your Nose)

That's the thing, right? You can't tell! But it looks real! I like to believe it's real, just like I like to believe the guy I played an online game of Starcraft with in 1998 really WAS Dexter Holland when I asked him if he knew who the Offspring were, and he said he was their singer.

Elderly Lady Masturbating Behind the Counter In A Small Town

I… OHHHOOOO… I'm cummmingggg… OHHHWHOA I - OHHHOOO I'm cumming!

(I guarantee you search for that and you'll come across it eventually)

I like that video where the guys shoves his entire head inside the woman, and she's laughing, laughing, laughing - it's fucking delightful.

Hulu's getting "Kill Me Until I'm Dead" in October.

Dirty dishes are no fun for your friends or family
when they pile up red's all I see
don't your dishes one more time
I'll pop you with my colt 45

Sweet Meme-motion

I've been super busy traveling, so I haven't had much time to do work. I've started a couple new short stories, though, and I've had people encouraging me to blog and travel-write (mentioned this a couple weeks ago in RD) which I haven't. Not really interesting to me right now!

Mentioned this in Savage Love already: I'm on this wacky trip to Brazil to visit a woman I met. Feeling good about that. 2 weeks away (not counting the week or so I've spent out of my place in Canada, and in Mexico)

Donald J. Trump in: Anal Discharge VII: Rectal Meltdown

Hey all! I meant to post this last night, but I was tired as fuck. I met a woman over online dating - a couple, actually, but one is tied up right now - from Brazil. I live on Canada's west coast. We started talking and ended up having these crazy-long conversations. Really involved stuff. It became obvious she liked…

I was thinking about this remake, then thinking about car songs which could be used it in, then thinking about someone doing a cover of Highway Star, then thinking about turning it into a terrifying existential story - Life is a Highway would also feature in the movie, of course - it's like Cars, except there are…

What if, like, someone did a version of 'Highway Star' called 'Highway Car', and it was from the perspective of the CAR?

This is beyond fucked.

Wangguardium Penisgrowsa!

Sup, chums! (interesting note: I almost typed, 'Sup, cums!' - true story!)
I really haven't had time to do any pop culture this week (aside from Monday's new American Dad!) owing some big Life Stuff (about which I will elucidate this coming week - on Wednesday) and changes going on. I think everyone hashed out this…

Mmmmm… cox.

The only eclipse I fuck beneath is my crippling depression!