“Then he found Diggs at the 34-yard line, and I thought Diggs was just gonna hop out of bounds to stop the clock. For a split second, I was like, “What is he doing?!”

Remember the right’s motto:

Let’s all go easy on this guy, he just woke up that day feeling particularly economically anxious.

You didn’t think they actually spent ten thousand dollars for a hammer and thirty thousand for a toilet seat, did you?

You people are all missing the point. Wealthy people deserve more wealth because they are wealthy. If you liberal atheists would sober up and stop having abortions after your gay sex parties and do some actual research, you’d know this. Right there in the Bible. Jesus said so and then went back to work as CEO of…

How many Stanley nickels can I get for a Schrute buck?

I think a lot of people (especially around these progressive parts) forget just how different Christian religious people view life (and how dangerous it is that they want to control the rest of ours). They don’t care that the 1st Amendment is not supposed to respect their religion. They believe that’s wrong. They…

The food is fine for what it is, I just have no idea how anyone makes money selling laxatives when the $5 hot and ready exists

2017: Where confidently lying about crowd sizes while the anyone with eyes can see you’re lying is the new normal.

So you still spent 3 hours there and that’s “fairly reasonable”? The. Fucking. Worst.

There are a lot of questions that I think need to be answered.

This keeps coming to mind...no birth control leads to people having babies. Which leads to the GOP wanting to protect the unborn but woe is the child and mother after birth.

Remember, the best way to stop a bad guy with a gun is by using a good guy with a gun with a clear shot on the 32nd floor of the Mandalay Bay Casino overlooking the event.

He’ll get like a 2 game suspension and a week from now some poor bastard will get 4 games for smoking weed, and shithead fans will nod, thankful that justice was done.

Oh, but he’s sorry he used a racial epithet! He was just mad you guys!

Cut this guy a break. He’s just economically anxious.

Isn’t it interesting that when drug addiction starts effecting middle class white people, suddenly it’s an “epidemic” that we need to address instead of a crime we need to punish?

This. We can’t have it both ways. Either you want the Democrats to throw a fit, take their toys and go home (a la the Tea Party), or you want them to fight tooth and nail to try to get some good things passed. I want Dreamers, people who go to school, pay their taxes, have jobs, serve in the fucking military, to be…