“Ha ha, speaking of dogs, I’ve got one at home. My wife. Just kidding honey. She loves dogs. I like dogs too, just not bitches. Ha ha. That’s our #Metoo movement.”

Lithuania is always an option.

What great reporting! Thank you, Diana.

Multi-sport athlete.

Clearly you don’t have the right stuff. Probably not a winner. Too thinky.

Old guy has stroke. Big deal. But if his 29-year-old fiancee had a stroke....

I hope his nickname is Snacks.

If you add up Hassan Whiteside’s three first round playoff games, does it equal 110%?

No.

This is how boxing has worked forever.

Partisan political maneuvering is why unions exist.

That box seat girl is some banker’s baby. You know who I feel bad for? That schlub dentist’s kid thirty rows up. It’s gonna take a slapshot to the face for that him to get a puck. Poor kid.

Three pointer!

He’ll watch the other Cowboys games from home.

Big deal. Lane Kiffin tracks beavers all the time.

$25,000 buys you maybe 15 minutes with one of Trump’s hookers. So they probably just wanted to spend the money on that.

Sounds like my first date.

Sometimes a fuse is just waiting to be lit.

I think I speak for most when fans when I say that this type of behavior should be encouraged.

Fact: Marty Foster was bullied in high school by fake-goatee-wearing drama department kids. Some wounds don’t heal.