@SmaartAasSaabr: In addition to the three LeMons examples, there was indeed a minty-fresh red driver that spent time in both the lot and the paddock.

@MushyHeirloom: So seriously, folks, don't worry about it. Worry instead, if you truly and absolutely must, about a certain glorious, backfiring, mildly-corroded Fiat 131.

@MushyHeirloom: So, yes, from a distance it's lovely, but it's basically rust, paint, and rollcage now.

@MushyHeirloom: Seriously, though, that's about all that's left.

@MushyHeirloom: Yes, it could be a lot worse - some of the trim pieces are fine, still.

@MushyHeirloom: Properly rusted, even, and with a not-quite-Earl-of-Scheib-level paint job. (Incidentally, Earl Scheib as a company no longer exists as of a week and a half ago.)

I know plenty of folks out there don't believe how wretched this car really is. Neither did I, until I saw it.

@Hopman: All three actually managed to leave the track after the final lap, too.... as did the Fiat, and of course the Thunderbird.

@Nürburgring: Varsity Jalop: Trust me, it doesn't. I spent a couple hours last night, a few miles from the track, parked beside a mildly seedy strip mall with an unsecured Netgear router nearby.

@MushyHeirloom: And it's not going to display my photo in that comment. Good job, hamsters. Good job.

@Murilee Martin: And here's the shed wheel the second time, back in the pit. Metal fatigue's a bitch.

@Hopman: Well, that one kinda turned out green, and then kinda turned out covered in writing after they got a couple of penalties. The Saab-powered Z31 kept on trucking, by the way.

@Paul Y. requires regruntling: They were New York plates. And yes, seeing one of those plates Hertz my eyes.

@philibuster: Skid? That seems like an absolutely horrible idea, unless tyres grow on trees in other parts of the country. I guess I'm too practical.

@philibuster: Your nerve, sir, is inspiring. I salute you.

@Elhigh: Such a vehicle could never even theoretically conceive of a burnout.

@luisthebeast: Purple powdercoating sounds like a better plan for the magenta thing, which could use a teardown anyway. I already have one purple bicycle, though...

@RustyO918: Exactly. If someone fucked with me and I saw an oncoming car, and there wasn't a shoulder for that car to dive onto, that someone would be getting PITted with a quickness.

@luisthebeast: Meanwhile, in rural New Hampshire, I pick up almost-perfectly-good bikes for free - mostly ordinary stuff (solid-fork GT mountain bike from when Clinton was elected, magenta Roadmaster hybrid, and of course a Sears Free Spirit) with lovely patina that hipsters would probably kill for (if they could).…

@ManBehindTheDesk: Do these 'real men' still have unscarred calves? I assume they live somewhere without steep hills, too.