No rear seats. Durable surfaces in the cargo area.

Give me some paint, and a sawzall, I’ll make it happen.

Portholes and Stripes and get to back to us

What do you mean? Dogs can drive cars!

A new and improved cheat device that’s undetectable?

“Reason number X you couldn’t pay me to live in that shithole.”

Yep, I just caught that too. That’s some clever work by the seller.

$18k for a totaled Aston, what’s next $10k for a malaise era GM product?

yeah i cleanched so hard its going to take a 5 man crew with heavy mining equipment to release the bit of underpant i have now pinched into a diamond.

It’s not a boat.

Jesus. Put a warning above that video. I hope my taint unclenches by the weekend.

Just to add the reason: Ford already had the Escort ZX2 coupe and the recently refreshed Mustang v6 coupe and they didnt want a 3rd coupe to compete for the sales, so they took what was already intended to be the final Probe and moved it up to Mercury. It was essentially a Contour Coupe.

You get others to pee on each other for you.

It the rumors about summer gas prices turn out to be true, people are going to come all the way back around to loving the Elio.

Careful, you might fall backwards into a presidency

God I wish I could sell bullshit as well as Paul Elio

If a story is older than two years, the readers have forgotten about it. Especially if it wasn’t tagged. I’d never seen this, so I thought it was interesting.

Yeah there was. It was renamed Cougar.

Wow I’m sorry if my comment came across like that, I wasn’t offended at all. It’s just that I’ve seen this happen so many times in the past. But I know that you guys don’t remember all the articles posted, especially ones from before you started working here. Also the number of articles posted on Jalopnik in a day…