Someone's going to get vertigo and hurl when they're seeing this from the stands, right?

I'm just glad she didn't mistake me for Aziz Ansari.

Is it wrong that part of me is actually just heartened by the fact that an old white man even knew who Malala was??

What is this affection with the strikethrough? It's annoying as fuck.

Republican Convention or Stanley Cup final?

Yeah, asshole, you just told everybody who has had a loved one die of a heart attack (e.g. me) "your loved one probably died because of being fat and lazy."

"THEEEEE BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCSSSSSSSSSS..." Chilling.

Kristen Schaal as Ray

STILL REQUIRE KRISTEN SCHAAL.

Oh, please. You clearly know nothing of this woman and her vile, attention-seeking behavior. She wasn't fired because her employer refused to accommodate her health needs; she was fired because she's wholly unpleasant and loathed by fans and castmates alike.

I'm not a prude by any means, but I remember when videos used to have a message or some sort of plot line. Now, they're just basically soft core porn set to autotune. And some are not-so-soft. But, I can't lie. I watched that video about 10 times. Because, my gawd. My eyeballs didn't know where to look.

Being drunk doesn't mean you you can't pitch for a Major League Baseball team. Hell the 2012 Boston Red Sox did it pretty well for most of the season...and by well i will soul crushingly bad.

"95% of people will have sex before they are married. Does that make it healthy? Not at all."

What the hell are you smoking? And more importantly where can I get some?

Much Words. Such Smugness. Wow.