Trying to turn off the notification that says their iCloud storage is full.

If I had that haircut I’d kill myself.

HAHAHAHA holy fuck that head shot at the top of the page... That guys for real?!

Well shit, if you’re living a hour of your life per day in your phone’s Settings, you ought to be sad. So many questions. That’s like 10% of your waking life looking at settings. On your phone.

That would be a hideous trade for the Wizards.

I’m just here to say this was excellent and that I’m glad you’re writing for this site.

uh definitely the wizards. you’re not giving up the piece that’s younger, costs less, and has produced when wall was out

Cold take: Wall is openly dumb. He didn’t know what quotations were called and called them “exclamation points”.

You have a small number of talented individuals who probably get paid more than they deserve but less than they are worth. You have a larger group that just scrapes by and one unlucky moment would put them in big trouble. You have a third group that just can’t make it and drop out of sight altogether. At the very top…

Damn, sir. I don’t even watch football, but this is fantastic. Particularly:

The 12s today have no idea who Shaun Alexander is! Is that like Marshawn Lynch’s dad or something?

Hey, the Warriors are getting whooped on right now so maybe they’re not going to make the Fi—never mind. We all know they’re gonna win it all again.

Ty Lue had the right idea - fake illness to avoid having to witness this shit show first hand. Shameful. Trade them all, starting with Gilbert and LeBron.

In that accurate list of reasons why the Cavs are putrid, I’d add that LeBron hasn’t played defense in a month and a half and that the team seems to hold Ty Lue in the same regard Allen Iverson once did.

The cracks are forming and I LOVE IT!

Thanks Bill for benching your best corner for the biggest game of the year.

There is no way BB would bench a player for the entire Super Bowl for missing curfew.

The Australian one is by far the best of the English language examples (with an honorable mention to Kevin Harlan). I mean, “...ball knocked out of his hands. Eagles recovah! The Eagles get the ball back. The script is flipped. Tom Brady bereft on the turf. It has literally been ripped from his grasp.” I want this guy…

So your only point is that you can’t get youtube red?