Come see my new film, A Stitch in Thyme. See, time/thyme, get it? There are absolutely no herbs in this film.

The title has always made me absolutely furious. It makes ZERO sense unless, say, he’s a made man in the mafia or something. Randomly swapping homophones around is not clever you absolutely awful assholes.

Wake in Fright is a masterpiece, arguably the greatest Australian film ever, but only a psychopath would show it to someone at 7.45am. The kangaroo hunt scene is so gruesome.

I am now rooting for the virus. Come on, li’l buddy, wipe us all out.

I really love The Damned United. That film and the good parts of The King’s Speech prove that Hooper is a talented theatre director.

All of these people are pathetic little babies compared to the hardcore ride-or-die Michael Jackson stans.

Just to be clear:

Non-canonical! Non-canonical!

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Wij. The satire is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical psychology most of the observations will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also Thomas’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal…

I am familiar with the works of Tom Six.

I saw this film when I was 14 and I didn’t sleep properly until I was 17. Not a single night.

UK, Australia and the United States have all elected dumbass right-wing populists over the past decade.

Yeah, put it in my eyeballs

Cats fucking rules. It's wild, trippy, constantly surprising and has a few decent tunes. Even the visuals are good, once your brain adjusts.

Most European schoolkids are stuck indefinitely at home, yet Disney+ doesn’t launch here until the 23rd. Big missed opportunity.

I read this novel (which I love) when it first came out. Bush, Cheney and the Patriot Act were the political background and the novel’s antisemitism was mostly metaphorical for other kinds of intolerence. It is beyond belief that we’re here 15 years later with a President who ran on Lindbergh’s actual slogan of…

Magnificent

Can’t wait for the movie version of this column, I hear it has a terrific cast.

She’s immortal now though. She’s Jack but with the power to regenerate rather than spend thousands of years as a floating head. There’s no known way to kill the Doctor — Timelord limits no longer apply.

I know "Phoebe Waller-Bridge" is the go-to solution for all writing problems, but she'd be an excellent showrunner. And Doctor.