Interestingly, my mother, about Peggy’s age, is not exactly a feminist because (I think) she felt pressured into certain choices - marriage, kids - and resents other women for not having to pay the same prices she did. Except for sexual harassment, which makes her a very outspoken feminist indeed. She liked the show,…

“Protection?” Yikes. Yeah, it’s a weird place where you apparently live on a different planet from other people? Except that you already realize how stupid that is.

I’m laughing thinking of black lights to detect virginal penises....

He also told the paper that the tests have been carried out for “a long time” and that they can even determine if a hymen was broken “accidentally” or through sex, which is very impressive, and, again, complete, skin-crawling nonsense.

Seconding that I think you have to know that adoption is what you want. I also think that it’s possible that adoptive parents may have to think outside the bounds of traditional families - i.e. the family I’m thinking of has an 11-year-old daughter whose birth mother and grandmother are a major part of their extended…

Seconding being more supportive of young parenthood - it’s something that societally speaking we really suck at. In my own family, I always get to hear younger mothers being called “immoral” or “idiots.” Pretty awful, and turned me off of family a bit. Plus it narrows the opportunity for serious relationships to a…

“I introduce my thick brown monster to your anus.”

Agreed - it’s a weak law, and we all deserve better.

I used FMLA to care for a dying parent - it’s not limited to women or new mothers specifically. There’s certainly nothing gender specific about it. BUT, like others said, it is unpaid and in my case, I was allowed to use some sick and vacation days to partially cover my 12 weeks away. Policies seem to vary from…

I don’t think that’s too weird. I was over 30 before I found out where I wanted to be permanently, and it was kind of an accident. I’ve also done the moving to a place I expected to love, and everybody else loved, and I just....didn’t. Everybody’s mileage varies.

Check into your employer’s retirement plans. See if they have a matching contribution if you put in a certain amount of $$. If they do, hey, it’s free money! Don’t pass it up. My nonprofit employer had a ridiculously low matching contribution, but I still took it. You might also look into Roth or traditional IRAs,…

Happy birthday!

Yeah, a month’s a really short time to get over an ex. Sounds like you need a break from dating.

I think that’s really normal. That’s been my whole dating life, really, over a number of years. I think I’m supposed to feel like it’s my fault (you’re high maintenance! you’re supposed to settle after a while! women are always responsible for bad relationships! - yeah, I’ve been getting a lot of that lately), but I…

I was really looking forward to this remake.....until my mother informed me in so many words that she and my dad used the 1975 Poldark for sexual inspiration.

Yeah. My mother got asked out on a date about 11 months after my dad died, and turned the guy down because she considered herself still in mourning (apparently, she wasn’t that interested). It didn’t freak me out, because she didn’t go on said date, but it caught me off guard. Now it makes me laugh, because of course…

I actually have used your line of “I’ve been alone a long time and feel awkward about this...” without going into the inexperience part of it. I decided not to disclose virginity in my case because I was so far over 30 that like you say, I would have felt completely uncomfortable about it. That said, I’ve had casual…

Ok, well that’s pretty encouraging. Honestly, I finally had a glass of wine and then tried kissing the guy (s) in question - I knew for me a little social lubricant was the only way to stop that worrying voice in my head. That was after a few dates, though.

I struggle with this as well - and I’ll turn 40 next year. But yes, I feel attacked by both sides: those who tell me I’m “wrong” if I wear makeup, and those who tell me “you’re not as pretty as you could be.” I work in an industry where it’s a point of pride for women not to wear makeup, but dammit, sometimes I feel…

You’re like me, except I was much older than you and my experience was a few drunken makeout sessions. :) You say you have the same anxiety about this guy as you did the last one - is it possible you’re just feeling the same “meh” as with the other guy? “Enjoying the guy’s company” is great but not the same thing as…