I’ve had lawsuits in the past and cannot deal with another one.

I honestly can’t think of a sport I dislike more than soccer right now, and not because of the Le Mans coverage issues. For starters, people here in Brazil won’t shut the holy fuck up about it, and how it’s the greatest thing ever and how you must have problems if you don’t like it or if you like a different sport.…

People just don’t understand how hard it is to be a boring white person. Our struggle is great.

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Reports out of Alouettes training camp say that Michael Sam was having a hard time adjusting to his role in the 12-man CFL defensive scheme, where teams generally employ a fifth defensive back.

I reported to my boss’s boss just yesterday that my boss (are you still with me?) told me in multiple salary negotiations that I don’t “need” more money because I’m a young woman with no children. Although I only mentioned it him for context in my current salary negotiations, I’ve been unsettled ever since that I did…

Should’ve checked tire pressures with a digital gauge. Probably was a couple PSI off on one side.

My womb IRL:

All the courts care about is that he got his property back. They don’t give a shit about children.

At the criminal hearing, Mount called her a “tiger mom,” too competent to be a victim.

*stares at screen*

What if in the VR room you have a 200 inch TV instead of whatever you have now?

I have that dress! I was a size 14 when I bought it and the goddamned 2X still didn’t fit! I kept it, however, because I still plan on fitting in to it someday. ;-)

Maybe the 1850’s were really onto something! Boy howdy, did the blacks know their place back then!

(Adjusts hoops skirt, takes sip of cordial, dies in childbirth at the ripe old age of 28)

I nominate Bernadette Peters for anything. Ever.

Your whole comment is a roller coaster from the ridiculous (Tigers) to the sublime (with kid) and up and down until you crashed entirely eith Slayer.

Stopped reading after you bought tickets to snow patrol.

Wow, there is literally not one thing in that paragraph that makes me want to trust any opinion of yours you’ll ever have for the rest of your life.

White people acoustic covers of trendy rap songs is worse than ISIS.