Totally. I hope Ben sees this. Any time you find yourself being contrasted/compared with Sandler, even if you find yourself on the good side of said contrast/comparison, it’s time to reconsider your life choices.

You’ve damned him with faint praise.

Does your dad listen to NPR, especially on the weekends? Because that’s where I first heard of this study a week or two ago, and it was described in glowing terms. There are some things on NPR on the weekends that leave me smh.

It’s guys like this for which shunning was invented. He should be shunned right off the planet.

True enough, but my memory goes back further to the Cardinals picking up their ball and taking it to Arizona, leaving a stadium-sized void that apparently had to be filled by the Rams.

I’m as intrigued by the brown thing the lower right corner is pointing at/touching. Is it a pie, is it some sort of leather encrusted pie? It’s all kind of frightening.

I have not seen your envelopes, but I have some spare buttons if you’re in need of a substitute.

And the next verse tells you to go into your closet and shut the door, go away to pray, in secret. Definitely want to avoid that one.