Bartenders, at least in Austin, prefer you walk it.

According to bartenders I’m friends with here in Austin, they prefer you walk and take the automatic 20%.

ok billy

keep it on deadspins dammit

• AUSTIN DOESN’T LIKE YOU EITHER

AND THEY’RE PLAYING A FREE SXSW SHOW AT AUDITORIUM SHORES ON SATURDAY NIGHT!!

cool

For the sake of my own mental health I sleep with a top sheet and wash them once a week. It’s an uplifting luxury for me.

What about Schrodingers’s SUV? It’s Bronco and Nomad until the cat dies.

he had too much money twenty years ago

These are one of my fears but the fact that this study was conducted in a county of less than 150,000 people gives me some relief. The demographics of Olmsted county are overwhelmingly white and Republican. I’ll call this a win.

My friend crashed his Busa two years ago this week. Had it not been for the helmet he would be dead. Even with it he was in a medically induced coma, went through multiple facial reconstruction surgeries, and as an Air Force officer had to delay his childhood dream of flying a fighter jet. Be careful out there.

A distressingly disturbed man cannot be disturbed further.

I deleted all dating apps last night. Gonna try meeting people in the real world. Also, Snapchat is toxic and will probably be gone by the weekend.

Improbably, the stuff can be found in the Scandinavian diaspora in Texas.

A $20? You must be unfamiliar with cocaine.

It doesn’t need to in order to implore you to.

I’m sorry to inform you that Turn Up on the Weekend is actually...good.

Ban MMA

I’m more interested in the fact that there is a ferry running between Denmark and Iceland.