I am intrigued by this idea. TO THE SHOWER!

I don’t buy that. I am 90% sure my wife drools more than I do while sleeping but her pillow remains unsoiled.

What the fuck is up with male face pillow stains?

Hockey themed spin-off opportunity?

...DUH!

I think you accidentally left your caps lock on, big guy.

glad I asked! Do you have a recommended team if I love piles of mashed taters to go with my love of huge dingers? ...asking for a friend.

better than a sharp stick in the...nevermind

Tried to pull off a similar joke at home a few days ago, it did not go over well.

what if I prefer huge dingers? Still good?

So...he’s Caucasian? I am so confused

+1 worlds largest Metamucil capsule.

no thanks, it would give children nightmares

lighten up, bud. I don’t think that anyone thinks less of the human behind geraltcloud9 for your post. I say stupid shit all the time in real life and in Kinja world, and I routinely (and rightfully) get called out for being a doofus. From one human to another, we’re sorry and never meant to upset you, just some…

Are you high? A dunk is any field goal that the release point of the ball from the hand of offensive player is above the rim while the ball travels in a straight line (i.e. not a parabolic arc) through the hoop.

This is the correct take. Bow down to the Jalapeno gods.

I’d still risk it. I do not have enough pepperoncini in my life.

$2.99 for a single serving bag of chips? Holy Moses! You could by a ginger ale and a small bottle of vodka for the same amount of money!

This is the correct take.

I think it affects their field of view in some small but noticeable ways. Looking down is an extremely important part of hockey, and the “chin cup” needed on a full cage mask definitely hinders this ability. The cage also slows down your reaction time very slightly making it take a split second longer to pick of where…