Gosh, they beat Trinidad AND Tobago?

Retire, old man, you’re fucking useless. You can cluck your dessicated tongue and wag your bony finger at Trump’s antics all you want, but you don’t actually do a goddamn thing about it.

As a white person who doesn’t enjoy deep dicking his immediate family, let me say that us non-sister fuckers want these pieces of trash as dead as you do. We are embarrassed by them and ashamed to share the same skin tone. I know an apology does nothing, but I’m honestly sorry for the behavior of the shitbag portion…

When it comes to Boston, “At least he wasn’t screaming racial slurs at the outfielders” is the best we can hope for.

Well Republicans are allowed to assemble, so I guess so.

In other news, the Islamic State’s campaign for a global holy war seems to be coming along nicely.

I wanna touch Kyle Korver!

Oh, just to pile on, Steve King is a national disgrace, and if the voters of his section of Iowa were capable, they should be ashamed not only that they can produce someone like Steve King, but that they continue to send him to Congress.

Little do they know that Croatians are neither whales or dolphins.

I thought Republicans liked the rule of law and the constitution and stuff? Why do they love the idea of holding someone without a warrant just because the federal government asked you to?

He’s never been IN the black either.

There was an earlier moment in the Cruz/Yates exchange that really pissed me off and makes Yates’ response so much more delicious. Cruz asks Yates if she was familiar with 8 U.S.C. 1182 and she says “not at the top of my head, no.”

Can’t wait until the midterms when we can finally slapshot these dummies out of the ballpark for a three point golazo spare. FORE!

“she showed me the blood coming down from her elbow,” Porter said. “It looked real purple and red and it looked like there was a hole in her jacket.”

Mike Matheny praised the fan for taking the bullet “the right way,” noting that glory boy fans in Chicago or Kansas City would’ve demanded a stoppage to the game and drawn much more attention to themselves.

“Compliments of your boy here.” Is a phrase I will be using constantly regardless of context

A lot of people say the crucifix was in, but I think he nailed it. And yet the double-A Binghamton Mets fans are screaming GIVE US BARABBAS (Antonio Barabbas, young Dominican shortstop prospect).

To be fair, those stigmata wounds in his hands open easily.

“Inadvertently ingest cocaine while kissing a woman solicited for sex on Craigslist the night before the olympic trials..” - also Rob Ford’s Make-a-Wish request.

To hurt your feelings.