That poker chip crap is the dumbest gimmick I’ve ever heard of, and I root for a team coached by Jack Del Rio.

At least they have guaranteed single-payer self-ownage insurance, unlike this toilet bowl of a country.

It’s got to be a tremendous advantage for him to have seen so many massive homers hit by others from only 60 feet away.

I don’t want to enable a criminal but your can usually find someone who’s willing to take a breathalyzer for you, especially for money. If you read this, Michael Floyd, it’s in Craigslist. Search “Blow Jobs.”

No low ballers. I know what I have here.

Hey, you scratched my anchor!

Can’t believe you gordon made lightfoot this situation.

Maybe stop naming ships Fitzgerald, Americans

Eat, sleep, train.

I like this one better:

I don’t want to read too much into the fight, mostly because I don’t want Floyd to get jealous.

“If you’ll remember, in the 2002 World Series, Darren was a toddler acting as a bat boy (who thought this was a good idea?) and nearly got run over by J.T. Snow and David Bell as they ran across home plate on a Kenny Lofton triple to deep center”

This whole draft process is just like my adolescence, eagerly hoping for a Ball to drop.

I want the Lakers to not take Ball so bad, just so his father can be shown all confused and angry on screen.

“Oh. I didn’t know that. I’m not from here, I’m from Canada.”

Bobby b the only guy to come ahead because of Madoff.

The Mets are paying Bonilla twice as much as the yankees are paying aaron judge this season.

Kids born when Bonilla signed that contract are entering their senior year of high school this fall, and kids born today will be in their senior year of high school when the contract finally ends.

All because the Mets’ owners had these killer investments going on with Bernie Madoff that they needed more up-front money…