It's "make [him] do that," which is even grosser.

True story: my wife was doing work that involved traveling around Los Angeles and the surrounding area, and she texted me that a gas station in Calabasas, CA had a chandelier and a bathroom with marble fixtures.

I love the subtle joke that she would be able to phonetically pronounce Bengali.

One time a good number of years ago I tried playing Street Fighter 2 Turbo HD on Xbox Live, and after getting my ass handed to me a couple of times I got the exact same "this is too dull to even be frustrating" sensation that I always got playing sports. I'll play against drunk friends or low-level AI, thanks.

I love fighting games for their bustling casts of characters and explosions of context-free violence - the actual mechanics of play and strategy are irrelevant to me. The prospect of a stripped-down fighter without the frisson of making Jill Valentine pummel Wolverine or ripping your opponent in half at the end isn't…

Ironically, that post is the perfect conclusion to a discussion of whether or not people's online behavior should "count" in the assessment of their character.

I owned that Playboy. I actually went on a long drive in the middle of the night to purchase it, first to an adult bookstore that didn't carry Playboy (too softcore), then stopping at every gas station and convenience store on the way home before finally finding a copy, in an almost symbolic turn of events, at a 7-11…

I still remember reading the scene at the shoestore, where the little kid is throwing a tantrum on the floor, and the mom scolds the older kid for having a hole in his sock. I was pretty young myself but not too young to have my mind blown by the idea that people's expectations aren't fixed.

I remember reading Judy Blume's early-gradeschool books up until about 3rd grade, then basically reading nothing but teen-horror franchises for a few years, and then seguing into Stephen King and Vonnegut in 7th grade - there was a lot of middle-school YA literature that I missed.

Alternately, you could say that the writer is exaggerating the subjective drama of a perfectly normal situation by affectionately caricaturing herself and her family. And the upshot of the whole anecdote is that a parent responded to a specific concern by engaging her daughter in a shared, constructive activity they…

From what I remember, that book was as much about mental illness as anything else, though I remember his relationship with music and his awkward sexual encounters rang pretty true.

Really? What I took away was that these kids were just being kids and deserved the opportunity to gain some life-experience. I don't think you earn the opportunity for life experience by broadcasting your immaturity - quite the opposite. And if we're going spin this issue into a larger political one, I consider…

It's not even like this was deeply buried social media content - it was a Facebook group with "Harvard" in the title. Going on record to say "I'm a teenager who will say terrible shit in order to keep pace with other teenagers saying terrible shit" is not a good way to inspire confidence.

If their beliefs were irrelevant to their behavior, those beliefs are irrelevant to the way their behavior is judged. This "kids will be kids" attitude works both ways - saying "we're too immature to keep this shit off a public forum (all of Facebook is a public forum)" doesn't bolster the argument "we deserve to…

(Psst - young women in rural areas have always been at that point.)

I assume the Facebook group had 70 members, and the other 60 managed to "apologize" well enough.

I'm moving to North Carolina in a few months, and I'm planning to whip it out at least 10 feet from the men's room door, just so there's no confusion. Also, I think I'm gonna start going to church.

"Apples into applesauce… a unification! Into one smooth mixture. An egg… nature's perfect container… the container of all our hopes for the future!"

"Somebody Russian is going to slip on a banana peel and break their neck!"
"Precisely, Robin! The only possible meaning…"

"Are these morons getting dumber or just louder?"