Gammy! Gammy! Gammy!

Randy? Is that you?

“Traveling through hyperspace ain’t like dusting crops, boy! Without precise calculations we could fly right through a star or bounce too close to a supernova...”

pssst...Violet Beauregarde

No! Do not stop the gestures!

I just right now realized that Piers Morgan is not Graham Norton. I was like, what’s the deal? The couple of times I watched his show (Graham Norton) he seemed pretty cool and likable. Why all the hate? Haha

This is glue. Strong stuff.

“Connie Sellecca. Nothing wrong that, huh”

I tipped 50% once. Mexican restaurant. Too many margaritas. So drunk I couldn’t do math. The waitress must have been stunned. I even got an email from my credit card asking if I meant to do that.

Fifth grade. March 4, 1975. A Tuesday night. On ABC.

Luke starts out swinging wildly at a practice droid and ends up a badass Jedi

He delivered a pizza to me once. In high school. While I was in class. The teacher got mad and handed out my pizza to random students in class. I didn’t even get a slice. What a dick!

I was really meh on tofu (and kale and brown rice, for that matter) until I found this deliciousness.

Except for the poor bird who can only swim. Tossed out of the sled without an umbrella/parachute by an elf who thought he could fly. Tragic.

But he brought a snorkel with him!

I think I’ve reached a point where I believe that those who think they were dead all along are either trolling or stupid. In either case the only answer is “you’re right, now go away.”

Battle Royale with Cheese

Never take spellcheck for granite.

You know what? If there are really people out there that still think that Lost ended up being about a bunch of dead people all the way through, I’ve decided that there is nothing that can be done to change their minds at this point. So yes you’re right. They were dead. They all died in the plane crash. Let us never…