Woah.

I don’t really like her and I absolutely loathe her music, but that is seriously fucking hilarious. A+.

Katy Perry was literally a “mic drop.”

Hello there, Mr. The Rock. Come get your candy.

This is why parents have got to teach their sons to do their own damn housework.

i wish his mother would use Planned Parenthood.

My dislike for Paul Ryan runs deep and it’s “wide enough to drive a Mack truck through it”

I suspect that Holmes can’t talk about any of her marriage to the press, or anything from that time period as a clause of her divorce. She, unlike Nicole Kidman, got to keep her child, so you know she had some serious dirt that she threatened them with. Of course, now she can’t actually come out with anything until…

I’m pretty sure if she outright apologized, they’d sue her like crazy and threaten her custody arrangement. It was about as close to an apology as one can expect, when the person in question is the primary caregiver to the child of a man who is Scientology’s public face. Think about how Kidman never got to see her…

I don’t think I drank enough coffee, because I immediately pictured a baby Olivia Pope at the White House.

Never start a hot take with “as a Pats fan” - the whole world knows what is coming next.

After what happened on the set of Mr. & Mrs. Smith, a lot of married actors were reportedly not allowed to make movies where Angie was the lead love interest.

Since that song was used in one of most iconic scenes from his most iconic film, I don’t think we should read too much into the lyrics. It’s just a textbook example of good old fashioned Tom Cruise narcissism.

I feel like after what happened on the set of Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Brad’s no longer allowed to make a movie where Angie isn’t the lead love interest.

Because it reads to me like deception was part of their business model from the very beginning. The 3rd party auditors are being hired to tell them something they already know.

I worked on that analogy for weeks.

Yeah, it’s a real mystery why people don’t care that a convicted child rapist was going to have to go back to jail longer.

to having drug-fueled sex with a 13-year-old girl

It sounds as if she repeatedly tried to help this man and his family when he was a child, but he dropped out of the two private schools for which she paid the tuition. That’s very different from his claim (funded and probably scripted by the National Enquirer) that she tried to adopt him and then abandoned him, so…

It honestly sounds like he fucked up big time by going to the national enquirer. Like, she used to give away cars to total strangers, she would have tried to help him.