15-year-olds shouldn’t be getting pregnant

You could always just skip it and have another 39th birthday.

OMARRRRRR!!!!!

I was so worried we wouldn’t be having one of these tonight!

Brings up really interesting nature vs. nurture questions. Like, I was capable of figuring out murder was bad long before I was 13, but how much of that is because I had good parents who would never want to kill someone?

He did what kids do.

This is hilarious, yet also sad, because I know some men actually believe that.

The nerve of these women! Men NEVER band together to get their candidates elected!

fixed that for you

Opportunistic Monster, thy name is Kris.

Thank you for your life-saving service. Now here’s the equivalent of $59.

Might get you from LA to SF. So generous.

Sometimes I think he’s a little short on the funny.

I’m guessing because there are so many regulations for baby furniture? Like if you buy an adult queen size bed frame from them and it’s $25 and it falls apart in 2 weeks they are just like yeah, that’s why it’s named kerrplunken.

I hate the term “Meghan Trainor” and I think she should be banned.

When this movie came out I was like, WOW 27- SUCH ADULT!

That's not a dog, it's an evolved dustball.

OMG when i saw the lead image i had a heart attack thinking this was an article announcing their divorce. these two are relationship goals, big time. my husband and i went to see them with my parents and it was soooo funny, however extremely awkward since they talk about oral 95% of the time