When have I said - even once - that the higher libido partner should not expect to be rejected occasionally? (as I have said many many times that compromise is about *both* partners compromising)

You don't see a problem with a person with a lower sex drive compromising by having more sex? You seem to see a problem with a person with a higher sex drive compromising by having less sex.

There is plenty of stuff out there about how high sex drives mean you might have bipolar disorder, or a sex addiction. Hypersexuality can sometimes be caused by medication.

But isn't that kind of part of compromise? Having sex more than you want? I just don't see the problem with that. If you love your spouse, take your vows seriously and are a true active partner in a relationship you do things to make the relationship work.

Oh I hate CNN- I wouldn't consider it an unbiased news source, and 3/4 of the crap they talk about isn't news, just click bait and scare tactics.

All I have been saying is that it is about compromise. And there is nothing wrong with reasonable refusal. And *both* partners need to ensure the other partners needs are met for intimacy.

dominant paradigm or not the experience I am providing- as the rejected partner who sought this information out sometimes obsessively for a period of 9 years - I never ran into that. I wouldn't have clicked something like a CNN article, or cosmo article because those are pretty trashy sources and not something I read.

Perhaps that is the prevailing message you have seen- but I don't read women's magazines and I have never seen this idea that the other partner should suck it up and do whatever the other wants.

No one is saying that compromise means they are getting the short end of the stick. Being constantly rejected and dealing with the heavy emotional fallout from that while your spouse makes *no* effort to remedy the situation is the short end of the stick. And of course, the other partner must makes concessions, too.

Hmm. I don't think there is a single person here arguing that the less horny person should be up for sex at the drop of a hat, lest the offend their partner. That was certainly never my expectation.

This kind of suggestion works very well when sex = orgasm and a physical release. It goes horribly wrong when sex is part of the intimacy of a relationship. There is a certain level of connected-ness I get from having sex with my partner that I don't get from spending time with him in other ways. Holding hands and…

Yea. Of alllllll the time I have spent in a marriage that was somewhat sexless for 9 years- seeing therapists, talking to friends, searching information and support out online- it was all about how I was broken and should just suck it up. Masturbate. Watch porn. Have an affair. Talk to your doctor, maybe there is…

I think that's a bit extreme. Marital rape exists, and is horrible- but let's have the discussion at hand (mismatched libidos and how to deal with it) and not conflate it with the heinous crime of sexual assault.

I get it.

I think the "just masturbate" suggestion is dangerous territory. Sex is sometimes about the physical release that leads to an orgasm - and the suggestion of masturbation is fine then.

Really? I've never heard this side of things. I've always just heard the more sexual partner should just STFU and be unsatisfied sexually for the rest of their life, and masturbate if they need to get off that badly. As if sex is never an expression of love, but simply some physical itch that is scratched by orgasm.…

It came from bad math.

The multi-dose vaccine thing is an unsubstantiated scare tactic. There is absolutely zero scientific evidence to support the idea that the amount of vaccines used today somehow stresses the immune system to the point of damage. In fact, vaccines today use less immune response inducing particles than vaccines used 30…

My mother remembers people celebrating in the streets when the Polio Vaccine was made available.

People just don't understand how deadly chicken pox can be. Yes, it is a common childhood illness, and YES most people who get it are FINE. But most people who get Polio were fine too.