I love their creativity, go them! I’ve fucked on twin beds far more than Queens or Kings, so I wouldn’t think anything of it.

Omg one of my best friends used to say that about his parents when we were in high school. I always wondered how it would work since his mom was a pretty big woman and they had a small bathroom. No room to soap up or shampoo your hair!

A friend of a friend used to work at the “Turtle Talk with Crush” attraction at Disney World. There’s a portion of the show where the children are allowed to ask Crush questions. Apparently a kid once asked Crush why her parents took a shower together in the hotel room that morning. I don’t know how he answered that…

OK, that’s funny!

OH MY GOD

That made me need pukey pukey time. (Disclaimer, might be a trifle inebriated.)

We bought our house from a couple with four kids. It took me a week before I noticed the slide-lock on the inside of the master bedroom door! (And yes, we used it too.)

The thought of those two bumping bones is so extremely unsexy. Like something’s sure to break if they do it.

Once the cat got explosive diarrhea in the master bedroom and my daughter came in while I was scrubbing the carpet and told me to clean it really well because that wasn’t a smell anyone would want to smell while you were in bed “hugging and touching each other’s faces.”

I just, in a horrified way, remembered all the times my parents had to discuss “Christmas” when I was a kid. You have scarred me.

literally anything is better than KISSY KISSY TIME

My parents both speak Spanish fluently so they would do that when they wanted to talk about stuff in front of us. Unbeknownst to them they started teaching Spanish in my sisters pre-k and she’s bomb at languages so we figured out most of the basics pretty quickly.

We use “talk about Christmas” as a code for some reason, but it’s more because we think it’s funny than because we’re trying to fool the kid.

Right? I have nothing against ugly kitsch, but 30 bucks a glass PLUS $20.00 for s&h just chafes.

Thirty dollar wine glasses for the customers to drink $2 wine from?

Obviously yes. Wait, edited because I misread that and just now realized its FOUR payments of $29.98, not just regular $29.98. No, I do not think I would, despite my love of tacky shit and cats.

I guess the same reason the Kardashians thought people would get a prepaid credit card that they were hawking. It had ridiculous fees so they had to cut it out.

Certainly not cosmetic surgeon advice.

why would anyone take student loan advice from Chyna?

Propose a company that scams your money to do something you could do for yourself completely free? Umm, no.