Your politics are showing

Uh, was he wrong on either count? Nope. Fuck off, Pop’s still a genius.

The sun was brighter. The grass was greener. Food tasted better.

If you don’t think Simmons and Embiid are among the most interesting players to watch in the NBA, then you, sir, are a crap fan.

Phoenix is Kirkland Signature™ trash.

I’ll meet you at any one of Oklahoma City’s Michelin starred restaurants. My treat.

I’d mock you, but I have an uneasy feeling that you might be my accountant.

Go back to school, herb:

The U.S. fell to Trinidad & Tobago last night, and will not compete in the 2018 World Cup.

Fuck Jerry Jones. Fuck Donald Trump. And fuck the Cowboys. You ain’t America’s team anymore. That honor belongs to the Jacksonville Jaguars.

As a non-Pats fan, let me just say: fuck ALL of you Pats fans.

The only statue in Baltimore that could use more protection is Joe Flacco.

That’s pretty impressive. I still don’t care.

What a lazy joke.

Like some sort of ban?

Needless flexing of authority, wild overreaction to immigrant, old and miserable.

In Ezekiel’s defense, he probably meant to punch out the woman instead.

Here’s my suggestion. Stanton vs. Judge. Pay-Per-View event.

Making fun of his weight is just picking low hanging fruit, which Christie would never touch, unless it’s covered in chocolate or filling a pie; because he’s a fatty fatty 2x4, can’t fit through the kitchen door.