What about the "I don't hate you because you're ugly, you're ugly because I hate you" girl?

The Italian justice system just released their official theme song:

Which reminds me, my new book, "The Holy Grail of Parenting" will be in stores this summer.

I thought Goop was what happens after you drink one too many of Gwynnie's special recipe smoothies. I'll use it in a sentence:

My main question after reading your question: If Beyonce's train leaves the station at 6:00 PM traveling west at 80 miles per hour, and on a parallel track, your train leaves the station 3 hours later traveling west a 100 miles per hour, at what time will your train catch up with Beyonce's?

This! I feel the same way about this Rita Ora person.

Dear Bey & Kim: How about both of yall quit fuckin' with your faces?

Keep doin' you.....keep doin' you.

This selfie is great, but nothing will compare to Joe Biden's finest hour...

"Bitch, please."

Please tell me you hit her in the head with a bible.

For the night is dark and full of terrors.

I like the fact that we live in world where people accuse one another of having a fake butt.

I was thinking the same thing. What role could someone with a lifeless face, a raspy voice and trout-pout be right for? Unless Lifetime is interested in producing my screenplay, Rode Hard and Hung Up Wet: The Lara Flynn Boyle Story.

It's not as sexy as it sounds. They do have lots of beads, though sadly, they are not of the anal variety.

It was quite the opposite when I was in Paris late last September. I don't know if they were "optimistic" about Winter, but it was freaking hot as hell and the women there all had on their boots, layers and heavy coats.

Just head over to the godless f*ck palace (Michael's) where they have a 60% framing coupon every week.

The face that launched a thousand dicks.

All of it needs to stop UNLESS someone is planning a White Chicks sequel, in which case, I am on board because Wayans Brothers.