As a very active President with lots of things happening, it is not possible for my surrogates to stand at podium with perfect accuracy!....

He won’t be able to show; he’ll be in prison.

Would they let him out of prison for it? The next presidential inauguration is not going to be a scheduled event and it def won’t be on January 20th.

Apparently she does. Look, I don’t care that she has 3 kids by 2 different baby daddies by age 26. It’s her life and she can do whatever she chooses reproductively and more power to her. What galls me is that she runs around making a living off preaching what she very very obviously has never practiced - abstinence in…

Atlee Bay sounds like it should be the name of a Midwest airport store that sells luggage and pashminas.

THERE AREN’T EVEN ANY BREAKFAST RECIPES THAT INCLUDE TUNA. HOW. WHY. ARE THEY JUST EATING PLAIN HOT TUNA?!?

me, to the mystery coworker:

they’re probably all gluten free anyway so can’t even have cake so they just paid for this monstrosity instead

That is not a cake or a birthday party. That is an ad and a branding opportunity. #sponcon

I guess this is what happens when you have no discernable personality of your own; you latch onto whatever you THINK gives you some gravitas... street protestor, Indian culture.

They hired a freelancer for the book itself.

Sure I’d do anything to meet Ja Rule!

It’s like if ratings were low so they introduced a new character from space.

The best part of this picture is that everyone else looks like they are dressed for their corporate office’s fun outing day.

Before the next time you feel like harping on “uneducated, poor English,” would you like some grammar pointers? Literally every sentence you wrote has a red flag.

Shay seems be going in a different direction with his music these days..... #awkward

Wow. That’s actually not bad.

It’s okay. We’ll all understand if you don’t speak ghetto.

Should have used bitcoin.