You know I laughed, but then...basically the best way of luring disgruntled, angry people away from the tentacles of demagogues, is to treat them like they are normal people, who just temporarily disconnected. It’s the Bob Wiley approach. Hang up and try again.

If you say so, Dear. (Virgo Mercury)

He’s a Scorpio. Scorpios only react in private. After they checked under the bed.

Let me see...I believe he’s getting there, but not quite yet. Perhaps if he dropped the Mephisto beard. Absolutely no pun intended.

Okay. Or teeny-weeny trunks. Or a piece of string and a napkin.

“View haloo?”

Lukas Haas in the Pussy Posse? That was a long, long time ago...

Okay (puts down note pad):

Hey, Shaka King? How’s it like being a male in Hollywood? Ever had that question asked while the interviewer ogled your cleavage and squeezed your caboose? How’s the view up there on your really, really, really high Equus caballus?

After party dress? After party doily, more like it. Perhaps I’m showing my age, but when you can breastfeed without moving your arms, you’re wearing too little. That and the red carpet dominatrix outfit were obviously designed by a 17 year old pimply faced Gamora-fan between, ahem, toilet breaks.

Sam Smith? Keep your mittens away from Tom’s minuscule swimming trunks. They are a national treasure and should not be tainted by a second rate Adele-wanna be.

“the grim discovery of a “decomposing body of a woman in the garden” altered the guests’ itinerary”

I feel like Hansel whenever people talk about Tom’s acting. I appreciate him. I haven’t actually seen him act, but I respect that he - and his lips- are out there, doing their thing.

I suffered through her “acting” in Doctor Who, so I hate her with the flare of a thousand burning suns. Then again I can’t stand the Kardashian girl, so...

That just makes me so sad for human kind. You can read much better written s/m fan fiction for free on the internet. Who would buy this book?

It was awful. It was bloody Benedict Cumberbatch taking a whole room hostage with his opinions. So I’m the only one who is god damn tired of idiots like Chris Rock using the Oscars to talk race and politics, when they, themselves, are incredibly narrow minded and bigoted?

I don’t care how worthy the cause was. Seeing a politician at the Oscars ruined my day. Couldn’t they keep their bloody over-inflated egos and constant need to be seen in check that one night of the year? Biden is the annoying idiot who makes another person’s birthday all about him.

In my opinion then Leo can act, it’s just in most films the director doesn’t ask him to. Many, many years ago, I saw This Boy’s Life, and I remember my mother, who had an acute hatred of DiCaprioo, since he admitted to peeing in the water in Titanic, said,

That’s cruel to treat any living creature like this. Even Donald Trump...

I read half a page of the book. Laughed. Discovered it wasn’t a comedy. Heard they were making a movie. Realized people were paying to go see it.