“Why are those burritos stinking and reeking like that?”
“uhh... because they’re the expensive kind?”

Because they don’t pay you enough?

“The New Trident MK XII: Will It Baby?”

I can’t tell if you’re advocating for keeping the current draft system or changing it.

Not for someone of Eddie Lacey’s stature.

Right? The even crazier thing is that on top of all that, they live their entire lives upside down!

like chicken, but your skin falls off.

That makes two of us. Florida.....

Also, did you know that some 3 bandeds roll up with their head on the right/tail on the left (like the title shot) and some roll up the opposite, but each individual armadillo only rolls up one way ever, for their entire life?


#sciencefacts

IF YOU WANT MOUTH LEPROSY

It must have been drizzling on the way to the show- why else would they have switched to the cut slicks?

At 28 years old, it’s now a classic, right? And it sure as hell ain’t fast, so that’s covered :)

The shot chart is off by a hash mark. He’s clearly on the second one from the line in the video.

#CANTHIDETHETRUTH

That’s why they offed Kim Jong-nam with VX. He kept picking up the phone to call his girlfriend right when Kim Jong-un was about to go attack with all of his carriers.

Of all of the specialized kitchen machines in the world, it’s still amazing to me that nobody has come up with an onion carmelizer. I would pay great money for a decent one.

PS: The blue is water and the clear is air.

I have devised plans for an ex-uber employee interview room which I will now share on the internet for a small fee. Here is a sample (Graphic Design done by myself, to save costs).

Don’t you think you were a little harsh on him?

It’s an honest mistake, guys. It’s not like they gave the nuclear launch codes to a mentally unstable narcissist.

“That’s terrible and shocking! But regardless, I’ll give you a screaming deal on a very nice coffin and remembrance ceremony! Here’s my card.”

-Jim Tomsula