You’re right, I’m interested in having a rational discussion on this topic that interests me (therefore, I’m going to be concerned with detail). That’s the first logical thing you’ve said yet.

I mean ... this will make me sound like the vapid fashionista stereotype I’ve spent the last 24 hours fighting against, but if your makeup feels uncomfortable, maybe you just need to switch up your makeup, or wear much less of it? I’m pretty lazy when it comes to makeup and hair. I have no patience for “painting” my…

Yeah well that’s the beauty of being a childless unmarried woman: I get 7+ hours of sleep a night and work out 5x a week. My frankly awesome shoulders can bear all that chip weight and anything else that gets thrown my way, for instance envious clucking from the hen pen.

yaaass

I see you are a pedant like your overrated namesake

You enjoy the botox you wrote a 3 paragraph long love letter/comment about and I will be equally happy with my normal face.

You can keep calling me bitter, but it won’t make it true. I’m a good-looking, successful lady who has chosen a certain life for myself, one that pleases me greatly, one that deviates from the expectations of our yes PATRIARCHAL society, and I’m not bitter as much as defensive and willing to fight all you smug moms…

I don’t live in photographs. I live in the real world.

Afropunk?? :D

You seem to think you’re some sort of saint for not yelling at your friends who have had cosmetic surgery. But your comments only reveal that you are a pretty terrible and very judgmental friend.

And I feel like a lot of these teen nose jobs are wanted because of years of conditioning by one’s family to believe that their nose needs to be fixed. Sure, lots of kids are insecure and will want to change something about themselves with no encouragement from anyone else (except, you know, our terrible society), but…

aw thanks. :) Jersey Pride, I gots it

Am I wrong? Are you unmarried—not divorced, but a woman who has chosen never to be married? And are you not a mother? Why would you even need to do kegels if you didn’t give birth? You freely volunteered that information about your vaginal workout, by the way, if these questions suddenly seem overly personal.

Single ladies put up with so much bullshit, from smug moms telling us our cats and dogs don’t “count” as kids so stop calling them that (eyeroll), to being the last ones at the office every night and the ones working on every holiday, to not getting those sweet-ass tax breaks because we don’t want to shackle ourselves…

You know who has historically had very chauvinistic opinions? Patti Smith

I’m not trying to like, ban you, dumbass, but I am tired of you being so very fucking dumb. Go back and carefully read what I said to you earlier. I’m not one of your slow-wit Facebook mom pals who just pops off and spews a bunch of nonsense. I think I put forth a very solid argument that you are either too lazy or…

Don’t mistake punching down for bitterness, honey.

I’m hardly “off the rails.” You’re just too basic to have any self-awareness. My argument is solid and I stand by it.

How am I a “bad guesser” when one of my two guesses was that you were 40+ and needlessly bitter about other women’s choices? I nailed it.

Yeah well I wish I lived in a world where heteronormativity wasn’t weaponized against gay folks and where even as a straight woman I wasn’t treated like (note: never actually felt like) a failure for not cohabiting, eventually marrying, and breeding with a man. Where from girlhood it is insisted upon you that the…