Stardew Valley: Darkest Timeline

Parasocial friendships seem like such a sad side effect of the late-stage capitalist world we live in where public spaces and the idea of a public good has kind of dissappeared and most of us spend stupid amounts of time stuck in our cars by ourselves commuting to and from work where a podcast of four people shooting…

I think a lot of young men grow up with the healthy notion that there are no such thing as leagues, and that people simply match up differently and this includes different tastes in physical appearance. But then one Sunday afternoon, they’re skipping channels on the TV and happen upon A League of Their Own. Unable to…

Obligatory

No shit that it works, MGS is so fucking Anime that it makes Anime looks weak in comparison.

Excuse me. A sandwich cut diagonally is still cut into halves. This kind of egregious error has finally pushed me over the edge, and I demand a full refund for all the content I have purchased over the years from Kotaku Dot Com.

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I think Kellam is in the game, too.

Here’s my thing: I thnk 7 is a perfectly fine number of FE characters. Melee exposed the series to the wider world and served to catalyze it into a highly valuable Nintendo franchise. Plus, the characters are inherently made for fighting. Seven is fine.

With both Mario brothers dead and without issue, the House of Mario is now bereft an heir. Thus, the line of succession passes to the Wa, a branch of the family that has often quarreled with the main line despite their weak claims to the seat of the main House. Now the incumbent family’s inherited domain—including…

As an animator, I’ve always had a personal pet peeve about people only ever being able to compliment animation on how “smooth” it is. Smooth isn’t hard. We’ve got prebuilt rigs and the ability to let a computer “tween” an infinite number of frames between one key pose and another. Even the crappiest animation can be…

Pictured: me

the fact it’s built on Duke 3D’s cover is just the best.

I started wondering who’d be a good exclusive for the Switch version, then I realized there was only really one answer:

It’s ok: we all self-own from time to time. Today was just your turn. :-)

Bruh.

I’m struggling to imagine why a minority party’s general refusal to be shouting about impeachment of a duly elected, first term President is some sort of cause for alarm. What is it that you think will be accomplished if Democrats in Congress start calling for impeachment, right now at this moment when impeachment…

So what the fuck is the individual citizen to do? I’ve lived beneath the poverty line most of my goddamn life and I’ve barely enough resources to support my family. I live in AK (a Red state) so I know that my phone call to Murkowski was just a waste and the only thing I’m doing when I argue with my Red neighbors is…

I misread the headline and thought the customer had asked someone to spit in his burger. Like some kind of kink thing.

I wasn’t baaashful about attacking them, and that’s mutton but the truth.