Boy if that isn't a cry for help.

You mean the one who doesn't attempt to hide the abyss within?

This is false on numerous levels.

Doing me no favors here, boss.

Is Posh the one up there who looks like she hates fun or the one whose head was clearly photoshopped onto someone else's body?

Game, set, match.

You in 2002 (presumably): Fuck that band, I'm glad I never liked them.

Eh, putting the Cars there is not right.

Ha! Hadn't heard that one. Shame on me for even trying.

That, or "Because your parents just died."

Ugh.

It was all over as soon as Jeb‽ said she was hot.

Yes, and since his dad's passing Tom seems to be more openly tenderhearted, so I imagine you're probably right.

RIP Garry Shandling. Larry Sanders was basically perfect. The unmanageable sexual tension between David Duchovny and Larry makes me laugh just thinking about it.

**Sees camera flash, flies into comments section in a blind rage**

Some ladies are just into Lizard People, I guess.

Upvoted for "shriveled gerkin."

The best part is that I actually sometimes forget he's bald as a stone. The kerchief works!

This was just all part of an elaborate heel-face turn.

Maybe you should have.