What if this study doesn’t say as much about patience and self-control in children as it does about the quality of marshmallows?

(I think they’re missing a wonderful opportunity for cross-promotion, personally.)

Cynical Gen X'er here - what Gen-Z doesn't realize, there never was a second marshmallow.

“weed-for-dogs business” if that doesn’t scream privilege to the max!

We’re stuck with this SCOTUS and I’m never going to forgive the people who gave us this.

Oh, he’s joygasming at this very moment because the Supreme Court upheld the fucking travel ban.

Somebody in the greys actually said this:

or ICOGNITO. We know you are there, idiot.

“But you have to be respectful of the people who put him in office or you’re going to get four more years just like these.”

I’m really not looking forward to another recession, because I’m already pretty fucking broke and 2008 was VERY hard for me and people like me. 

Pantyhose. Pointy-toead high heels. Fucking ‘shapewear.’ Thongs. BRAS. All those items of clothing you need to tear off your body after a day at work because if you wear them for one more fucking second you will tear your own head off.

I thought I’d add a new take on a fan favorite.

I’ve been reported for a “threatening tone” for just being flat in an email before 🙄😒 Not every email needs to be excited, Susan.

Cilantro tasting like soap is the shittiest X-Men mutant power out there.

And this here is why I have no faith in the utility of centrists. They’ll shout about decorum till they get burned alive by fucking Trump supporters.

Polite white people will be the death of us all

Anyone who uses “libtard” shouldn’t be allowed to reproduce. That term makes me cringe.

Womp womp.