Just because you like individuals of a different race doesn’t mean you’re not racist.

I agree wholeheartedly with this take. Like... lady, don’t post something that pretty clearly makes it look like you’re the other woman and then act surprised when people think you had an affair.

So she put up an Instagram post essentially referring to herself as the other woman and now she’s like “Whoa, I support marriage, so where did you get this idea from?” Come on.

The Rhoden family would like to thank everyone for all of the outpouring of prayers and support for their family... They asked that you continue to keep them in your prayers. They want to thank all of law enforcement from Pike County and surrounding counties for their immediate response - especially sheriff Charlie…

So 4 to 1 odds her ex is her brother or cousin?

In that neck of the woods, he could be all three.

Just another bullet-ridden day in the good ole US of A.

A small town? A series of inexplicable murders?

So Prince was a ridiculously talented musician, gave lots of money to various charities without making a big deal out of it, was a gorgeous human specimen and had a sense of humour about himself? The world needs more of that, not less. Life is unfair

My listeners are calling today with great stories - including a woman who saw Purple Rain in a theater in Atlanta - her friends still owe her a steak dinner because she spotted Prince and was the only one who believed it was really him. When he passed the group in the balcony he winked at her - he’d overheard the…

Aw shit. Patton Oswalts wife passed away. So young. Poor guy, hes such a sweetheart.

As a representative of the captial for mega-clubs and bottle service, allow me to give my standard explainer on bottle service:

‘“Save the Earth” really means “Save the Humans” or “Save the Life on Earth”. Earth the planet will outlast all extinctions.’

Have you ever had a runner? I was thisclose to leashing my younger one. Kid had a death wish.

Lies. Do you have a kid?

I gotcha. For some reason, I was picturing a 12-year-old (ish) even though you didn’t actually say anything that indicated it. If you wanted to, maybe his appearances with the muppets would be an age-appropriate introduction?

Honey... I know you’re hurting right now, but that is your child, and you need to teach her.

TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL, THEN.

Send her to her room!

I was just reading the new post about Prince stating that he’d celebrate when he died. My daughter looked at my phone and asked to play the clip. I told her that I’d rather she not as I will start crying. She hurt me so bad and she had the nerve to say, “Well you don’t have to listen. I don’t know who that Prince-y…