That's Mean Mark Calloway to you!

Take me down to WWE City
Where the 'roids are free and they're also plenty

I was expecting Jonathan Coachman!

I hear it has a cast of acting greats, and Al Snow!

As someone on Twitter pointed out, this is basically Voldo from the Soul Calibur games in real life.

Hey, they stole that riff from the cold open of that one Cheers episode!

Our house
In the middle of a reboot
Our house
Trying to do anything is moot
Our house
The salesman made it sound like a hoot
Our house
He said it was of good repute

That's (naming convention) hospitality, and you don't piss on (naming convention) hospitality.

I remember that Bohemian Rhapsody video doing a million views a day for its first week on Youtube (something unheard of at the time unless your name was Justin Bieber), so hearing that it's only at 54 million several years later is actually a little bit surprising.

He did fill in for Larry King at least once…

Ooh who'd be the perfect second person to piss Trump off the most? Baldwin? Obama? Rosie O'Donnell? Schwarzenegger?

All award voters are heathens; let it go.

I was expecting this article to be about things more along the lines of P.D.Q. Bach for some reason. It turned out much more interesting.

Liar.

Agent Botox McGee

They do, and it's one of the best parts of this feature.

JAYS!

Apparently!

"How am I doing at settling this civil dispute?"
"NOT GREAT, DOUG!"

…wait, a professional curling match can't be completed in two hours.