No but he did piss his pants.

Don’t leave us hanging; did the hyenas eat him?

I just spent 15 minutes listening to my best friend/neighbors father recounting a story of almost being eaten by hyenas when he was a kid. That has nothing to do with this article I just wanted to tell someone.

I snort-laughed at “I’M SORRY OK DAMN.”

Yeah the weed smokers I know insist they don’t smell or their clothes don’t smell later on. Um yes I can smell that you are/have been smoking weed dumbass.

You do have that white guy, short haircut that I would be weary of...

 (let’s be real, I haven’t smoked weed in like, 10 years)

We need to age restrict the site. This is too much.

That’s just proves one thing, there are bunch of kids on Jez.

past winners have been ordering in, sex, and caffeine.

wine in a box(tm): it’s like wine, but there’s more of it!

What can i say? I am a constant surprise. Also DONT JUDGE ME

Long vacations with alcohol.

Listen you young whippersnapper, I can look in the mirror and see how old I am without all your hippity-hoppity newfangled slang making me feel even older!

Last weekend my son went to a school dance. As I pulled up next to the building for pickup, I hear “The Piano Man”. My eyes roll HARD, because BJ is in my “no listen” perimeter that I try to maintain at all times. After I pick up child, child turns to me and with all the indignation he can muster, says, “Mom, they…

You can’t. That’s how you know it’s good.

Had to pick my eyes up from across the room when they rolled away from me...

Right? I was like Jonathan Hay should have stayed anonymous. I mean really...Nikki is the whole package? Pfft. Whateva man.

...curl up in the fetal position and hide until everyone forgets about her getting obliterated?

Also, “Jonathan Hay”? I see you Nicki.

This isn’t a publicist fight. This is a rap battle. Nikki has already lost. Her silence is bad for her as a rapper. As pop’s rap princess I doubt it’ll hurt it her but her rap fans might pass on her next single. Remember when 50 took out Ja Rule? This is that. ETA: only better of course.