The only thing it needs is Binky Griptite’s “Stone Soul Christmas” to be perfect.

His expression - especially in the living room photo - has a strong Otto the Autopilot vibe.

“Møøse trained by Yutte Hermsgervørdenbrøtbørda, Special Møøse Effects Olaf Prot.”

Name one.

The Onion had some good Easter cards back in the day.

The legal reason many defendants don’t often testify in criminal trials is because they have a constitutional right not to do so. The burden of proving guilt lies solely with the government and defendants can’t be compelled to testify against themselves. The practical reason why most defendants don’t testify is…

“We’re going to need more butter.”

“... or possibly even Godzilla Yet Kong, which has a wistfulness to it that we’re actually pretty into.”  Nice.

I’m pretty sure this post is about me.

One of these things is not like the others ...

On the internet nobody knows ...

“I mean, I can understand a viewpoint that might be angry at what she says about women. But it’s not some obscene, über-right-wing fascist,” he argues, disregarding the fact that transphobia is, in fact, popular (and ongoing) policy for the right wing.

I didn’t know any of that and I’m prepared to think it might be addictive - it is to me anyway. In addition, I think I would like to hang out with the person who came up with “glycyrrhizic” as a word.

Jerry Garcia on Deadheads: “They’re like people who like black licorice. Not everyone likes black licorice but the people who like black licorice really like black licorice.” Sounds legit.

I haven’t seen any jury interviews. There’s a piece on the verdict on a site called Deadline.com that purports to briefly summarize the closing arguments. It looks like Rapp was inconsistent in some of the details about the incident. However, I think it’s probably the battery of neuropsychological tests Rapp’s…

Absent complete incompetence on plaintiff’s counsels’ part, the jury is going to be made up of at least some people who were likely to lean toward Rapp’s position. The fact that they made it to the jury room, elected a foreperson and probably did an initial canvass of each juror’s thoughts and were out in 90 minutes…

It may not be an exoneration, but a 90 minute defense verdict is a pretty good indication that the evidence in this case wasn’t all that strong. 

“Red Right Hand” has a much spookier groove for sure. For me, “Curse of Millhaven” gets the nod for Stinky Bohoon and his friend with the pumpkin sized head.

No “Curse of Millhaven”?  That ain’t right.

The first time I saw “U.S. v. $50,000" as a case name without knowing what was going on, I thought it was kind of funny. Then I learned about in rem forfeiture and was outraged by it. I’m still outraged by it.