Here’s my spiny baby.

Saw this on Instagram:

You should have gotten a sharpie and drawn a comma after Trump. That’s a more accurate message.

—Factory farming is fucking terrible, but much more difficult to avoid than wearing fur.—

Hoofs.

Also not supporting fur, but it remains very weird to me how many people are ardently opposed to wearing fur but have no problem whatsoever supporting factory farming.

I am not certain people would enjoy carrying the bourbon of that. I know it would be unbeerable to many, and that wine would flow freely in the aftermath, but we can probably expect inevitable accusations of racism to make a conviction too whisky. Luckily, this isn’t the era of Tequila Mockingbird, so I don’t think…

Legally Orange.

because the only way to stop the constant flow of my tears is to quickly distract myself with laughs - if anyone knows how the toilet paper was dispensed in the men’s room, please keep it yourself.

Gun show, neighbor, relative, craigslist, Crackerbarrel parking lot. Whatcha want? I’ll have it for you by dinner time tomorrow if it’s legally sold in the US. A week if it isn’t.

I think it’s more like;

All I’m sayin’ yo.

Are you genuinely confused about this? I’m a woman who is attracted to both women and men, and based on my friend group and personal experience I can confirm both lesbians and “women attracted to men” are also into “this” (regardless of whether you are referring to Alaska Thunderfuck, or Rupaul’s Drag Race, or just…

Bottles extra, just like the kibble cones at the petting zoo. And posed photos for $5 each. Gotta start the college fund early.

it’s doctor hoooo

*unnamed. Thus far unnamed.

Most of the living people’s names are wrong, too. I’d love to get Kenan’s reaction to being called “Kenyan.”

It’s Lewy Body Disease/Dementia (LBD)

Exactly! I ended it by saying, “That’s great you only think of yourself, guess you have nothing to lose. You might be upset when they cut down the woods you’re hiding in and you have nowhere else to bury your head in the sand”