I'll see this documentary, but…
All you really need to know is that these dudes made SINS OF THE FLESHAPOIDS and HOLD ME WHILE I'M NAKED. Watch those and you'll know everything. Not just about the Kuchar brothers, but every-goddamn-thing. They're that good.

Ooh, Norma Jean. Despite its "Christian metal" status, BLESS THE MARTYR AND KISS THE CHILD can still tear your fucking head off.

Yeah, I never quite got why everyone's tits-over-tail for Jeepers Creepers. I think it's overlong and jes' not terribly funny. Plus, Jeanne Tripplehorn. She makes everything awful. (It's true. Look it up.) In fact, I think the episode as a whole is one of the series's lesser entries.

So it's…
DIRTY DANCING, if DIRTY DANCING went through the Seth Brundle machine with STAND AND DELIVER? How the fuck have I not seen this already? Golan/globus, you magnificent bastards.

COUP DE TORCHON is a model of adaptation. Tavernier took an excellent book rooted firmly in pulp Americana and re-established it in French-controlled West Africa without losing a beat or compromising any thematics. Awesome film.

"an album that's only 32 minutes long"
That, I think, is what I appreciate most about Joe Pernice - his albums are resolutely free of filler. Name me a bum track on "The World Won't End" or "Overcome by Happiness" or "Massachusetts." You can't, because they aren't there. All the bad shit gets trimmed out.

And I just gotta say this:

"Identity troubles are the topic of the day, correct? Just staying on theme here. No confirm, no deny. "

I've lost track - is it still implicitly racist to like filmmakers from Belgium? Or are we beyond that? 'Cause if being down with LA PROMESSE is racist, then fuck it.

Touchy nothing. Prove to me that the bulk of what you've been saying has had some other thrust than "Oh, this guy only likes movies by and about white people." Go on. Do it.

Anything by Lightning Bolt. "In Two Parts" by the Scissor Girls. "Six Nightmares at the Pinball Masquerade" by the Blood Brothers. "Phoenix in Flames" by Converge.

James Mangold, reliable?
The only way that dude is reliable is knowing that whatever he makes will be as machine-tooled and mediocre as possible… unless it's worse than that (see: ID-GODDAMNED-DENTITY). Fuck that guy. He deserves KNIGHT AND DAY, and KNIGHT AND DAY deserves him.

METAAAAAAL!!!!
"As someone who loves metal beyond all reason, I say it's a blessing that most metal albums don't contain a lyric sheet, and that metal is something you enjoy in spite of the lyrics, not because of them."

Could have also been HUNTER'S BLOOD. Or SOUTHERN COMFORT. Or SHOOT. There was a bit of a cottage industry for these things right on up to the mid-80s. Thanks, Burt Reynolds!

In the Name of the King
You forgot to mention the ninjas. How could you forget the ninjas? They make the movie!

I'll bet William Girdler could tell you about it. IF HE WERE ALIVE, YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD.

Both "Country Feedback" and "Leave" are terrific choices. May I also throw "Monty Got a Raw Deal," "The Apologist" and "Sad Professor" out there? I believe I shall.

"Loom of the Land" and "When I First Came to Town," for sure. Also "Thirsty Dog" and "Lovely Creature" and "Brompton Oratory" and "The Ballad of Robert Moore and Betty Coltrane" and "Hiding All Away."

I've seen a bunch of shit on my lonesome. But I don't think I'll ever be as proud of a screening as I was when I saw RAVENOUS during its opening weekend in a local two-screen dinkyplex. It was my mother and I, plus three teenagers sitting two rows down. I was the only one laughing.

The first thing that came to my mind was…
STARRY EYED AND BOLLOCK NAKED by Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine. It's got the consistency and cohesiveness of one of their studio albums and basically proves how ridiculously consistent those two were at the height of their powers. But apparently, I'm the only one who…