This dude also believes in the Illuminati. He's bonkers.

Dismiss the troll. I hope you can find a therapist that is compassionate to your struggles and can provide the assistance you desire.

I'm a big fan of "waste of carbon", which is especially insulting, considering how incredibly abundant carbon is in nature.

Tristan is amazeballs. Seriously. And a genuinely sweet person to boot!

I actually got a little teary eyed on public transit, reading that. Viva Lupita!

Although I was not involved in the production, I have heard the tale of that fateful night when someone replaced the iced tea for actual whiskey during a performance of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" at my former community theater.

They never found out who did it, and the actors were both schockered and extremely…

Thank you! I fancy myself a writer, so I appreciate your compliment. I considered waxing poetic about my dress, or the amazing food, or the fact that my ex has a rather debilitating stutter, but realized that simplicity was best in this case.

I am not, but we are still good friends.

Now that I think about it, the only way this story could have been better would have been if I'd thrown up on my ex.

I'm so glad that people are getting a kick out of it. I was absolutely mortified at the time, but it is a great story to tell at parties now.

Goodness gracious, you poor dear!

It really really does.

Thank youuuu. *bows*

My birthday is exactly a week before Christmas, and as such, is almost always the day that my office chooses to have their holiday party. This has happened several times over the years with various jobs, and it is generally uncomfortable and has occasionally gotten weird.

The most memorable, however, was several…

Pistachio pudding, mini marshmallows, cool whip, and crushed pineapple. It's a midwest thing.

Agreeeeeed. Pumpkin pie is the worst thing ever. BLECH.

I'm late to the party, and in the greys here, but last Thanksgiving was spent with my ex's family. He was fired from his startup, and I was left to put on a happy face, while my ex spent the whole day texting (sexting) his now girlfriend, and only interacting with me to let off his sexual frustration.

The fiery doritos taco is the best.

I managed to find one, at the age of 30 (he's 34), and in San Francisco, of all places! Don't give up!

I would still totally wear that dress on the left.