I once got drunk and separated from a friend in Wisconsin, and my phone died. You know what I did? I hung at a coffee shop til I could get a ride. So I guess I’m a better drunk decider than this dude?

You may run like Mays, but you hit like shit

He should consider himself lucky, the Vikings version of this story ends in a woodchipper.

it never o’curd to him they’d see his prints in the snow?

Back in my college days when I was drinking rum it was always referred to as Jobu’s rum.

Probably watched that movie 1,000 times. She played a great role

As a Bears fan... NO NO NO NO NO. I would rather have Cutler for another year. Kaepernick has been bad for two years now.

I’m curious where Kaepernick goes next year.

I don’t know you! That’s my purse!

Reports are that Wilson was red-faced, yet stoic and just floated off into oblivion.

I suspect this will become the primary goal once the Raiders and Warriors leave Oakland.

The hint here for the Athletics is to get their shit together

This made me chuckle.

If you’re not from Brazil, it’s hard to understand the magnitude of this tragedy.

As a life long Packer fan, I have to say that still having a chance in a butt division does not mean we haven’t been butt this year. Maybe , if Michael learns the offense and the defense continues to get healthier, they can be less butt. But Deadspin is not the place for optimism.

A butt division?

He really made a spectacle of himself.

“Pros and Cons” is what all publicly financed stadiums the Cincinnati Bengals should be called

I’m old and remember it. Mondale ran on the platform of telling people he was going to raise taxes and deriding primary opponents by citing the tag line of a Wendy’s commercial.